Part 3 is here.
On April 1, the same day as real world Wrestlemania – we’ll have Counterfactual WM XXII from Chicago. We’ve set up the entire card and are now taking one more look, a final look, at the matchups.
In the previous post, we looked at the three title matches and the opening tag. Here, we’ll look at the rest of the card, four big singles matches, and an abnormally prominent darm match.
Ric Flair (w/Arn) v. Matt Hardy
Shawn Michaels v. Edge
Kurt Angle v. S Money Shelton Benjamin
Hardcore Legend’s Match: Cactus Jack (w/Heyman) v. RVD (w/Stevie)
Dark Match: CM Punk v. Paul London v. Brian Kendrick v. Jamie Noble
Wrestlemania is coming on April 1 – we’ve set the card, and in the last post, went into even more depth, if such a thing is possible, on the 3 title matches and the opening tag – let’s reset the rest of the singles card now.
Ric Flair (w/Arn) v. Matt HardyEvery singles match, up and down the card, is very personal here in Chicago for WM XXII.
At stake in this match is a contract for Matt Hardy, who hasn’t been an official employee of the WWF since quitting after Summer Slam ’04. Even as a babyface general manager, Flair was the force in the company preventing Hardy’s official return in the summer of ’05 in the Edge/Lita angle.
Flair, of course, is a multi-time NWA Champion and was WWF Champion during his initial run in the early 90s. He returned to the WWF in the run up to Rumble ’02, putting Team NWA on the line against Angle’s Double Title. Kurt won, and the NWA invasion angle ended. Subsequently, Flair restarted the Horsemen, with his protégée Leviathan (Batista) and Eddy and Benoit. Flair and Leviathan won the tag titles over Haas and Benjamin at MSG in WM XX, dropping at Summer Slam to Mysterio and Van Dam. A year later, at XXI, Flair turned face as part of the 3 judge panel for the Benoit/Guerrero main event, becoming the deciding vote in requiring that the match continue. Flair then joined Steamboat, sharing power – until the creation of the 51% Solution when he, Arn, and Hunter became the dominant heel faction in the company.
Throughout it all, Flair, in his position of power, stood against Hardy. Matt, along with his brother Jeff, first joined the WWF as teenagers, working as ring boys for the Clique, and eventually were joined in the WWF ring boy program by Edge and Christian, who worked for Owen Hart. After months of cajoling, they finally were allowed in ring action – the daredevil Hardys becoming tag champs at WM XV, seven years ago, against Rock and DLo, the Nation of Domination.
Edge and Christian turned heel during the celebration, joining Trish, Hunter, and Waltman as the new Clique – and that feud, joined by the Dudleys later in the year, ran until the end of 2002.
Matt turned heel during a year+ long feud with Van Dam, Matt being managed by Bischoff – and after blowing Bischoff off, frustrated with his position in the company, quit the WWF after losing to Booker T at Summer Slam ’04.
Matt returned in the “real life” angle with Edge in the summer of ’05, losing to Edge in the unsanctioned match at Summer Slam ’05, gaining revenge by crucifying Edge on RAW – appearing periodically to Twist of Fate anyone, including Hunter and Flair, who might stand in his way – drawing the hatred of the Solution.
Matt beat Edge in the empty arena match at the Rumble, driving an ice pick into his eye – and when Edge agreed to help the Solution in the War Games Match on SNME, he secured the deal from Flair that leads to this match.
If Matt wins – he comes back to the WWF – but his contract will be held for a year by Edge – if Matt can live up to the terms of the deal, not touching Edge throughout the course of the year, then he and Edge will meet – once last time – in the main event at WM XXIII in Detroit, in the 3rd ever Hell In A Cell Match.
But Matt’s gotta go through the Nature Boy first – who vows that WM will be the last time anyone ever sees Matt Hardy in a WWF ring.
It’s Flair/Hardy at WM XXII!
Shawn Michaels v. Edge (w/Lita)
It’s the battle of former Clique stablemates, with the legendary Triple Crown winning Michaels taking on the whitehot heel Edge.
Shawn’s first WWF title was back in 1989, amazingly, over 17 ½ years ago. Shawn and Marty, the Rockers, took the tag straps from the Brainbusters at Rumble ’89. They gave the titles back at WM V to Arn and Tully, then retook at Summer Slam. Shawn turned on Marty at Rumble ’90, allowing Jake Roberts and Roddy Piper to win the tag titles, then launched into a singles career, losing an IC shot to Bret Hart at VI, and then again at Survivor Series ’90. Michaels didn’t return to the title picture until ’92, when, in an unprecedented happening, he beat Randy Savage for the IC at Survivor Series – and then immediately turned around and lost the title in an impromptu match to Owen Hart.
At Rumble ’93, Shawn regained the IC, beating Owen, to become a two time tag and IC Champ, it was in that same year that he, Razor Ramon, and then eventually Diesel and Sean Waltman, formed the Clique – bonding over a common interest in having a good time and a mutual dislike for the Hart Foundation, that feud, Clique v. Harts, becoming the cornerstone of the WWF (and, as mentioned, the entrance for Matt and Edge).
At IX and Summer Slam, Shawn kept in two defenses over Mr. Perfect, then beat Waltman at Survivor Series ’93. Shawn kept over Razor at Rumble ’94 – then dropped in the ladder match at X. As a babyface, Shawn returned at Survivor Series ’94, winning the WWF Title and the Triple Crown in his hometown of San Antonio over his longtime rival, Owen Hart.
That title run was shortlived, Shawn dropped to Bret at XI – and turned around and won a record 3rd IC Title, beating Razor at Summer Slam ’95. Shawn kept over the Franchise, Shane Douglas, at Survivor Series – but then dropped to the debuting monster from the Rocky Mountains, Vader, at Rumble ’96.
But, in the Iron Man Match at XII – Michaels became a 2 time WWF Champ – beating Bret Hart ten years ago.
Shawn kept over Owen at Summer Slam, then dropped to Bret at Survivor Series, losing again to the 3 time WWF Champion Hit Man at Rumble ’97. Shawn got another title shot at Survivor Series ’97 – the famous 4 way match where Bret Hart had to leave the WWF forever, as Owen regained the vacant title belt. Shawn’s last match of the first run came at XIV, 8 years ago, when he lost a title shot to Owen Hart. The following night, Michaels was punked out by Hunter and Waltman, kicked out of the Clique – which would lead to Shawn’s long sabbatical from the WWF – and also to Edge and Christian, who by then were seconding Owen, joining the Clique one year later at XV.
It would be another year before Edge and Christian would win the tag straps, beating the Hardys and Dudleys at TLC2 at Summer Slam ’00. They kept those straps in the splitting in half of the Clique, beating Waltman and HHH at Survivor Series, but then dropped them at Rumble ’01 to the ECW team of Taz and Raven. For the first time, Edge and Michaels encountered each other at XVIII, in Edge’s hometown of Toronto – when E and C lost the opening tag to HHH and Razor Ramon, with Michaels making a surprise return to the WWF, superkicking E and C postmatch.
Michaels, now older, wiser, and admittedly a step slower, won his 4th IC title at Summer Slam that year, beating RVD; he then dropped the strap in a ladder match at Survivor Series in MSG.
Rumble ’03 marked both Edge’s last WWF appearance for a year and a half, in the infamous final TLC match where all the participants except for Matt Hardy were stretchered out – and it was Michaels’s return to the main event, losing to Kurt Angle.
Michaels and Hunter took the tag titles at XIX, Shawn’s third tag run, straps that he’d lose at Rumble ’04 – and that led to Edge and Michaels, two generations of Clique – coming together for the reunification at XX, Edge returning to save Shawn after his win over HHH.
Clique/Harts became the dominant focus of the WWF once again, Michaels losing what, to date, has been his last WWF title shot, to Benoit at Rumble ’05 – while Edge took the IC from Jericho.
Then, as mentioned, the summer of ’05 saw the Edge/Lita/Matt issue – with Edge telling his Clique stablemates that they could trust him, that the rumors were untrue – and when it, of course, turned out that Edge was lying – it busted up the Clique – a fissure developing, really among all four men, Christian left the company and the war between Michaels and Edge began.
Multiple times, Edge has attacked Shawn (and so, incidentally, has Matt as Shawn has taken a position against both men; Shawn increasingly pressing the religious button as part of his character) it was Edge’s interference at Survivor Series ’05 that allowed HHH to beat Shawn, ending the Clique – and after Edge again aided the Solution in the War Games match, he got from Flair this Mania match against the Heart Break Kid.
It’s Michaels. It’s Edge It’s Wrestlemania.
Kurt Angle v. S Money Shelton Benjamin
Your Olympic hero, Kurt Angle, debuted at XV, seven years ago, as a new signee, sitting in the crowd, who hopped into the ring to save the American flag from being burned by The Southern Man Jeff Jarrett.
Angle then spent two years building up an undefeated record before winning the WWF Title from Benoit at XVII in Houston.
What followed was a Sammartino/Hogan like babyface title run the likes of which hadn’t been seen in the Counterfactual – Angle successfully defended the title against Van Dam, Booker, Flair, Hennig at XVIII, consolidated the 3 championship belts by beating Rey, Jericho, Michaels at Rumble ’03…
At Rumble ’03, Angle’s protégées from the reality television show Camp Angle, Haas and Benjamin, shocked the world by winning the tag titles from Benoit and Guerrero – but at the close of the evening turned heel, joining Brock Lesnar in declaring war on their former mentor.
Haas and Benjamin lost the straps at XIX to Michaels and HHH – but Angle, main eventing Mania for the 3rd year in a row, held onto his straps, beating Lesnar.
But that match led to Angle’s brief retirement, the neck surgery that forced him to relinquish the world title, and led to what had been long in coming, the heel turn as he leapt from his wheelchair to bash both Vince and Eddy – rejoining Lesnar, Haas and Benjamin – Brock was not long for the company, but his role in the revamped Team Angle would be filled by Steve Regal.
Team Angle returned to the top of the WWF at Rumble ’04 – Kurt regaining the strap over Eddy, and Haas and Benjamin regaining theirs over Michaels and HHH.
In the Match of the Year for ’04 – Angle lost the strap at XX in MSG to Benoit, his 4th straight Mania main event, tying Ricky Steamboat, who mained at I-IV, just behind Bret Hart, who mained at an amazing 6 consecutive (and a total of 7) Wrestlemanias (VIII-XIII) (Benoit will be maining his 3rd consecutive Mania and 5th overall at XXII when he takes on Mysterio for the strap) while Haas and Benjamin also lost to Flair and Leviathan. Angle had one more title shot, losing the Iron Man rematch to Benoit at Summer Slam ’04 – but Haas and Benjamin staked their claim as the greatest WWF tag team of all time, winning their 3rd straps over Rey and RVD at Survivor Series.
They dropped to Helms and Rhyno at the Rumble – the first of a series of pinfalls suffered by Haas – the final one being at the opening tag in last year’s Mania that led to Angle requiring Benjamin to turn on his partner, ending Haas’s run in the WWF.
Over the past year, Benjamin has been forced to “learn” from Kurt – carrying Kurt’s bags, kept out of PPVs as Kurt tells S Money that he isn’t ready for the big shows.
Benjamin’s frustration grew – and at Rumble ’06, when Angle interfered on Hunter’s behalf to allow him a win over the increasingly popular Benjamin – Shelton snapped on Kurt later in the evening, aiding Michaels in his win over Kurt.
The battle has raged on since Mania – and now Kurt Angle, bald, crazy, roid raging Kurt Angle meets his protégée S Money at WM XXII.
Hardcore Legend’s Match: Cactus Jack (w/Paul E) v. Rob Van Dam (w/Stevie Richards)
Begun with Andre beating David Sammartino at I, the legend’s match is a Wrestlemania staple, Cactus Jack has a legend’s win, he and the Rock tagging over Brock/Goldberg at XX (Undertaker has 5 wins, the record).
The legend’s match this year is a play off the unofficial title of hardcore legend that has been bestowed on RVD and is being violently contested by the Triple Crown winning Cactus Jack, coming out of retirement to take him on at XXII.
Cactus Jack is a Counterfactual superstar, he and Sting, coming off a feud, formed a tag team and won the NWA straps over a Horsemen combination of Arn and Rick Rude at Fall Brawl ’93, keeping those straps over the Nasty Boys at Starrcade that same year, but then dropping to Nobbs and Saggs at Superbrawl ’94, 12 years ago. Cactus next appeared in the title hunt a year and a half later, in ECW at November to Remember, losing a TV title shot to 2 Cold Scorpio – a title that Van Dam would take from Scorp one year later.
Cactus had moved on by that point, having debuted at Summer Slam ’96, losing an IC shot to Vader but then taking the strap at Survivor Series. Holding their companies respective secondary belts – Cactus kept over Terry Funk at Rumble ’97, Van Dam kept over Great Sasuke at the first ECW PPV Barely Legal.
Cactus kept again at his first Mania, 9 years ago at XIII, beating Vader once more, and Van Dam matched him beating Al Snow at Hardcore Heaven. Jack turned heel at Summer Slam ’97, keeping his strap in a DQ win, snapping on Ken Shamrock in the Octagon; a title he’d then lose to Shamrock at Survivor Series; while RVD continued his TV run, beating Jerry Lynn at N2R.
Van Dam kept over the returning 2 Cold at Living Dangerously ’98, while Cactus added a WWF tag strap to his resume, he and Terry Funk going over Rock and DLo at the Rumble; they’d lose those straps to the New Age Outlaws at XIV – but then, at Summer Slam in MSG, Cactus became a Triple Crown winner, beating Owen Hart for the WWF Title.
2 years after winning the TV title – RVD continued his remarkable run over Jerry Lynn at N2R ’98; while Cactus kept over Shamrock at Survivor Series in the infamous Hell in a Cell match that began his slow face turn.
When RVD was keeping over Sabu at Living Dangerously – Cactus was dropping to Owen, Owen’s 3rd WWF title, at Rumble ’99; Owen’s last match took place at Cactus’s first ever WM main event, in Philly at XV – Cactus regaining the WWF Title and completing his babyface transformation. RVD’s run didn’t abate – he beat Taka Michinoku at Hardcore Heaven ’99 and then Taz at Heatwave.
Cactus kept the rest of the year, beating Austin in a long awaited battle of Triple Crown legends at Summer Slam, then won the 3 way dance against two men who never won the WWF Title – Rock and Hunter at Survivor Series; RVD wasn’t so lucky, he finally dropped the ECW TV title to Lance Storm at N2R.
Jack had one more successful title defense, beating the debuting Taz at Rumble ’00 in MSG before dropping to Benoit at XVI – and RVD finally won the ECW World title, going over Masato Tanaka at Hardcore Heaven, before turning around and dropping to Jerry Lynn at Heatwave, and then regaining over Lynn at Guilty as Charged ’01.
Van Dam brought that ECW Title to the WWF at Summer Slam ’01, dropping the strap to Angle – but, with Paul Heyman as his manager, gained from the WWF the contractual concession that, for the length of his WWF career, all of his matches would be “hardcore” No DQ matches. Team ECW blew up as 2002 approached, RVD winning the right to carry the banner of Extreme forward at Rumble ’02 when he took the IC from Taz. From that point, Van Dam, with Paul E – became what Cactus Jack had once been, the face of North American hardcore wrestling. RVD kept the IC over Austin at XVIII, dropped to Michaels at Summer Slam – but then, in a Ladder Match at Madison Square Garden, retook the straps over Michaels at Survivor Series.
Van Dam lost those straps, to Rey Mysterio at Rumble ’03; and then began a year long feud with Matt Hardy, a feud that would see him, upon its conclusion at XX, turn babyface and break away from Heyman – that turn led to his winning the tag straps with Mysterio at Summer Slam ’04 – but, with Heyman paying them to do so, Team Angle took RVD apart and took the straps at Survivor Series, knocking RVD out of action for over a year.
At the close of ’05, Van Dam returned, this time with Stevie Richards (who had once been taken apart by ECW wrestlers at the behest of Heyman) as his manager – in the same tag team gauntlet match that saw Cactus Jack, who had been back periodically since his retirement, return as well.
Jack aided Van Dam in that match – enough that when RVD returned to PPV at Rumble ’06 against Kid Kash, who represented the ECW forces, he had Cactus in his corner.
RVD won – but Cactus turned – joining Paul E in their efforts to reclaim the mantle of Extreme from Van Dam.
One man will emerge from XXII as the Hardcore Legend – will it be Cactus Jack or will it be Rob Van Dam?
And finally…
Dark Match: CM Punk v. Paul London v. Brian Kendrick v. Jamie Noble
Another Counterfactual tradition; the conceit of our world is that only wrestlers who work the actual PPV (or who work dark) can wrestle on the Counterfactual show – meaning that there are lots of wrestlers, many times superior workers who one would like to see in the Counterfactual – but cannot be used.
So, they work dark without storyline.
Here though, really for the first time, a storyline is being furthered at a match you’ll never see – the four way Ring of Honor dark match at XXII.
Jamie Noble, the Redneck Messiah, first appeared on PPV in ’00, he lost a US title shot to Lance Storm at Starrcade, then again at Superbrawl ’01. He and Kidman had a low level WWF tag team once the NWA joined WWF, Noble establishing his wrestling credentials by beating Chris Benoit at Survivor Series ’03 – also in the WWF by then, London and Kendrick, as protégées of their former trainer, Shawn Michaels – both men distinguished themselves in the big 64 man tournament to fill the vacant WWF title.
Noble would leave the WWF after having his ankle broken (a tradition in Counterfactual WWF) by Benoit, and Kendrick would do the same after a heel turning Helmsley broke his arm with the sledgehammer.
London got a singles win over Jericho in early ’04, became a full fledged Clique member in the big angle at XX, and then lost a chance at the IC in a 3 way at Summer Slam with Eddy and Jericho. London beat Mysterio at Rumble ’05 – then lost to Rey one year ago at XXI, as Rey’s ascension to the very top of the company began.
The big angle that saw the end of the Clique and the forming of the 51% Solution at Survivor Series ’05, also saw the beginning of this angle – Kendrick returning from a sabbatical at ROH to attack London, preventing him from saving Michaels. Kendrick began an assault on his former partner – saying an unnamed wrestler at ROH made clear that London was blackballing him…and then that was topped by the return of Noble, who attacked Kendrick, the man who was his partner at ROH, saying that he was told by an unnamed wrestler in that Brian had the chance to take Noble with him back to WWF, and turned it down.
That set up the 3 way with them at Rumble ’06, won by Kendrick, where the unnamed wrestler was revealed as CM Punk, who attended the show with his girlfriend Maria.
Punk’s mindgames continued, as he told the other 3 men that they were being held down by the WWF and by their need to win WWF titles – that he was coming to WWF not for glory but to become a better wrestler – and as such, would not wrestle on WWF TV.
When booked on RAW – Punk’s taken the losses, refusing to wrestle – attacking his opponent postmatch – but never getting in the ring – and now, with XXII being held in Punk’s hometown of Chicago – he has turned down his Mania debut – taking a dark match 4 way as opposed to working on camera. It’s the indie, ROH 4 way dark match, and it will begin XXII.
It’s all coming up in 2 weeks – on April 1 it’s WM XXII.
Undisputed Title: Mysterio v. Benoit
Worldwide Titles: Fit v. Regal
Unified Tag Titles: Bradshaw/Booker v. LWO v. ?
Flair v. Matt
HBK v. Edge
Angle v. Benjamin
Cactus v. RVD
51% Solution v. MNM v. DMW v. Orton/Cena
It’s Wrestlemania 22 – call your cable company!
Showing posts with label Road to Wrestlemania XXII. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Road to Wrestlemania XXII. Show all posts
Road to Wrestlemania Part 3 2006
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Part 2 was here.
A month from tomorrow, April 1, 2007, is real world WM XXIII – so, on that day, it just makes sense to post Counterfactual WM XXII – and once again, here is your card:
Undisputed Championship of the World: Rey Mysterio v. Chris Benoit
-Friends pitted against each other by the 51% Solution, the last two Triple Crown winners meet for the first ever time on PPV. Rey has been World Champ since taking from Eddy at Summer Slam ’05; he held off the LWO at both Survivor Series and the Royal Rumble, despite the efforts of Ric Flair to get the belts off him. Benoit is a two time WWF Champ, he took from Cactus Jack 6 years ago at XVI in Anaheim, holding the belt for a year before dropping to Kurt Angle at XVII. 3 years later, at XX in MSG, it was Benoit/Angle again, this time with Benoit winning the strap. One year ago, at XXI in LA, Benoit lost the titles to Eddy; Benoit regrouped, beating Chris Jericho in the Lizard King’s last WWF match at Summer Slam ’05, then at Survivor Series, winning the vacant Worldwide Titles over Angle. Benoit then dropped those titles at the Rumble, losing to the Sunshine Boys, Fit Finlay, managed by Benoit’s longtime stablemate, Dean Malenko. Benoit and Rey had begun to tag together in the run up to the Rumble; Benoit looking to protect Rey from the Solution; Rey looking to keep Malenko off Chris. So, when Rey was attacked by the Solution at the Rumble’s close – Benoit came in for the save – leading to both men getting squashed by Executioner Lashley, as he joined the Solution. Benoit and Rey returned for the big Saturday Night’s Main Event War Games match, but their tag partnership was ended when the Solution made Benoit the number one contender for XXII.
Two of the greatest wrestlers who ever lived in the main event at Wrestlemania. That’s always the goal – it’s the biggest match ever year – this year, no exception – Rey Mysterio takes on Chris Benoit for the Undisputed Championship of the World!
Worldwide Titles: Fit Finlay (w/Dean) v. Steve Regal
-Such a personal feud here, again, between two of the best wrestlers in the world. From their days in Europe, to the NWA, and now in the WWF, Fit and Regal continue their war. After several years working behind the scenes as a member of the Titan Trust (w/Arn and Dean) Fit was convinced, by Malenko, to return to the ring at the end of 2005; although he struggled at first, with the help of Regal, who signed on as Finlay’s training partner, following the bustup of Team Angle, Fit was able to capture the Worldwide belts at the Rumble, defeating Benoit. Regal has held WWF gold before, although not in several years; he defeated Chris Jericho for the IC title at Survivor Series 2000, keeping over Steve Austin at Rumble ’01 – but then dropping to Austin the Falls Count Anywhere match at XVII, five years ago. A year ago, at XXI, during the Clique/Team Angle feud, Regal got a shot at these Worldwide belts, but lost to then champion Edge. In the big swerve on Saturday Night’s Main Event, it was Regal who submitted in the figure four to Flair – costing Ricky Steamboat his 49% of control over the WWF, and giving full power to the 51% Solution. But as it turned out, Regal had been working with the Solution and had thrown the bout to Flair. In payment for services rendered – Regal gets the shot against the men he sold out in that War Games match, Finlay and Malenko. Fit Finlay takes on Steve Regal for the Worldwide Belts!
Unified Tag Titles: Bradshaw/Booker (w/Conway) v. LWO (w/Carlito) v. ?
-Bradshaw and Booker have been tag champs since their Survivor Series win over Orton/Cena. Bradshaw is George Herbert Bradshaw, taken from the former President Bush’s name – or GHB, a drug reference, for short. His gimmick is he is the NeoCon, espousing whatever the current line of propaganda is being offered by conservatives for the policy of the Bush Administration. Along with his lackey, Rob Conway (nicknamed Anal Cysts for the medical deferment Rush Limbaugh received during Vietnam) Bradshaw ran through a series of veteran partners (Holly, Morley, and at Summer Slam ’05, Nick Dinsmore) in a fruitless attempt to win the tag belts from Orton and Cena, who he viewed as talentless punk slacker hippy kids. Finally, Bradshaw reached out to Book. As with Bradshaw, Booker had yet to win gold in his WWF career – he had one high profile shot, that being a Survivor Series ’01 loss to Angle for the WWF Championship; Booker has taken a laid back approach to his career, as the main who only wrestles when he needs a paycheck. But the two veterans came together, sensing the time was right to make a run at gold. Their title reign has been one of constant comedic bickering, given their political and cultural differences; Book/Bradshaw is probably the highest profile comedy act in Counterfactual history. They kept at the Rumble, going over the reunited SpreeKillers, Shane Helms and Chavo Guerrero and now step into the 3 way dance. One of their opposing teams is Super Crazy and Psychosis, managed by Carlito Colon, the Latino World Order. The LWO arrived in the summer of ’05, taking aim at Eddy. They browbeat him into putting his Undisputed Title up against Mysterio at Summer Slam – and when Rey won – they turned on him, with the support of Ric Flair. Juventud got the first shot at Rey, losing a 2 out of 3 falls Lucha Libre world title match at Survivor Series; Flair, now with the 51% Solution, stacked the deck at the Rumble, as both Psycho and Crazy, in a 3 way dance, got the title shot at the Rumble – Carlito was now the group’s mouthpiece, having punted Juvie, but again, the LWO failed to take the straps from Rey. However, their joining the Solution in the postmatch beatdown that took Rey out of action temporarily curried favor with the Solution and got them in this title match.
The third team will come from the winner of the opening match of WM XXII, which, by tradition for each of our shows, is a tag team match.
At XXII, it’s a 4 way, the former tag champs: Orton/Cena, MNM, DMW, and the new 51% Solution team of HHH and Executioner Lashley.
Orton and Cena were a comedy act, a team that got a babyface reaction because their heel shtick – Cena as wannabe rapper and Orton bragging about being Cowboy Bob’s kid, was so silly they couldn’t be taken seriously – they got a shocking win a year ago, at XXI over the then version of the SpreeKillers, Helms/Rhyno. The fans then began to turn on them, as they recognized that, particularly Cena, wasn’t worthy of holding the tag straps but yet acted as if he were, making heels Bradshaw and Dinsmore de facto faces at Summer Slam – and leading to a big babyface reaction for Bradshaw/Booker (which continued for Booker, less so for Bradshaw) when they beat Orton/Cena at Survivor Series. Since then, Orton/Cena have continued to lose, a rift developing between them as Orton clearly blames the lesser Cena for the defeats. Orton’s taken to showing off the RKO (which we’ve just called a diamond cutter – but will now give him his finisher name) demonstrating that he can take guys out whenever he wants. MNM and DMW have been feuding since Survivor Series, trading wins through the Rumble. MNM is the same act as in real world WWF, it’s Nitro and Mercury with Melina as the valet. They’re cocky heels. DMW is Dead Men Walking – Kane, still in the mask, and PAUL (The Big Show) with the Undertaker as the third man, sometimes working in the tag team, or in a trio, generally on the outside as an enforcer. Neither MNM nor any of the monsters have ever won a title, MNM has yet to get a shot – Undertaker had a shot at the WWF Title way back in Rumble ’94, when he was still unbeaten, he submitted to Bret Hart. He then had an IC shot at Vader 10 years ago at WM XII, losing that bout. The first version of DMW, Undertaker and Kane, had a tag title shot at SummerSlam ’03, but lost to the Clique, Michaels and HHH. They’ve been heels, faces, and feuded – but PAUL began to worship the Japanese wrestler Akira Taue, master of the chokeslam – even wearing Taue gear to the ring, the big men became lovable veterans, with Kane and eventually the ‘Taker following suit. The Dead Man has been a WM staple, holding the record as the 5 time winner of another WM tradition – the legend’s match – which at XXII is contested between Cactus and RVD. HHH and Lashley are a new team, representing the dominant stable in the WWF, the 51% Solution. Hunter, a former tag champ with Michaels, as mentioned, but long seen as the Clique water carrier, re-emerged at Summer Slam as the new husband of Stephanie McMahon, heir to the family business. Hunter said he had two percent creative control now over the WWF (Flair and Steamboat, both babyfaces, seemingly, had 49% apiece) making him the swing vote. He promised that come XXII, he’d be leaving Chicago with gold.
While HHH-M was beating Michaels at Survivor Series, ending the Clique forever – Lashley was debuting as the Executioner – he doesn’t speak, outside of a primal scream – he shakes the ropes – he punishes people – he has a black X, like Bernard Hopkins, over both his chest and back and wears a hood to the ring – although not when he wrestles. Flair joined Hunter (along with Arn) at Survivor Series, forming the 51% Solution and promised a 4th man would emerge at the Rumble. At that Rumble, HHH beat S Money (Benjamin) while Lashley, who had earlier mowed down the opposing teams in the tag title match – joined the Solution following the World Title match, taking Rey and Benoit both out. At the in ring announcement of the opening tag and subsequent tag title match – Lashley decimated the ring, taking apart all of the opposing teams, save the Undertaker, the only man he has yet to put down.
So, those are the title matches on the line at WM XXII – plus the 4 way opening tag.
It’s only a month away, The road concludes.
A month from tomorrow, April 1, 2007, is real world WM XXIII – so, on that day, it just makes sense to post Counterfactual WM XXII – and once again, here is your card:
Undisputed Championship of the World: Rey Mysterio v. Chris Benoit
-Friends pitted against each other by the 51% Solution, the last two Triple Crown winners meet for the first ever time on PPV. Rey has been World Champ since taking from Eddy at Summer Slam ’05; he held off the LWO at both Survivor Series and the Royal Rumble, despite the efforts of Ric Flair to get the belts off him. Benoit is a two time WWF Champ, he took from Cactus Jack 6 years ago at XVI in Anaheim, holding the belt for a year before dropping to Kurt Angle at XVII. 3 years later, at XX in MSG, it was Benoit/Angle again, this time with Benoit winning the strap. One year ago, at XXI in LA, Benoit lost the titles to Eddy; Benoit regrouped, beating Chris Jericho in the Lizard King’s last WWF match at Summer Slam ’05, then at Survivor Series, winning the vacant Worldwide Titles over Angle. Benoit then dropped those titles at the Rumble, losing to the Sunshine Boys, Fit Finlay, managed by Benoit’s longtime stablemate, Dean Malenko. Benoit and Rey had begun to tag together in the run up to the Rumble; Benoit looking to protect Rey from the Solution; Rey looking to keep Malenko off Chris. So, when Rey was attacked by the Solution at the Rumble’s close – Benoit came in for the save – leading to both men getting squashed by Executioner Lashley, as he joined the Solution. Benoit and Rey returned for the big Saturday Night’s Main Event War Games match, but their tag partnership was ended when the Solution made Benoit the number one contender for XXII.
Two of the greatest wrestlers who ever lived in the main event at Wrestlemania. That’s always the goal – it’s the biggest match ever year – this year, no exception – Rey Mysterio takes on Chris Benoit for the Undisputed Championship of the World!
Worldwide Titles: Fit Finlay (w/Dean) v. Steve Regal
-Such a personal feud here, again, between two of the best wrestlers in the world. From their days in Europe, to the NWA, and now in the WWF, Fit and Regal continue their war. After several years working behind the scenes as a member of the Titan Trust (w/Arn and Dean) Fit was convinced, by Malenko, to return to the ring at the end of 2005; although he struggled at first, with the help of Regal, who signed on as Finlay’s training partner, following the bustup of Team Angle, Fit was able to capture the Worldwide belts at the Rumble, defeating Benoit. Regal has held WWF gold before, although not in several years; he defeated Chris Jericho for the IC title at Survivor Series 2000, keeping over Steve Austin at Rumble ’01 – but then dropping to Austin the Falls Count Anywhere match at XVII, five years ago. A year ago, at XXI, during the Clique/Team Angle feud, Regal got a shot at these Worldwide belts, but lost to then champion Edge. In the big swerve on Saturday Night’s Main Event, it was Regal who submitted in the figure four to Flair – costing Ricky Steamboat his 49% of control over the WWF, and giving full power to the 51% Solution. But as it turned out, Regal had been working with the Solution and had thrown the bout to Flair. In payment for services rendered – Regal gets the shot against the men he sold out in that War Games match, Finlay and Malenko. Fit Finlay takes on Steve Regal for the Worldwide Belts!
Unified Tag Titles: Bradshaw/Booker (w/Conway) v. LWO (w/Carlito) v. ?
-Bradshaw and Booker have been tag champs since their Survivor Series win over Orton/Cena. Bradshaw is George Herbert Bradshaw, taken from the former President Bush’s name – or GHB, a drug reference, for short. His gimmick is he is the NeoCon, espousing whatever the current line of propaganda is being offered by conservatives for the policy of the Bush Administration. Along with his lackey, Rob Conway (nicknamed Anal Cysts for the medical deferment Rush Limbaugh received during Vietnam) Bradshaw ran through a series of veteran partners (Holly, Morley, and at Summer Slam ’05, Nick Dinsmore) in a fruitless attempt to win the tag belts from Orton and Cena, who he viewed as talentless punk slacker hippy kids. Finally, Bradshaw reached out to Book. As with Bradshaw, Booker had yet to win gold in his WWF career – he had one high profile shot, that being a Survivor Series ’01 loss to Angle for the WWF Championship; Booker has taken a laid back approach to his career, as the main who only wrestles when he needs a paycheck. But the two veterans came together, sensing the time was right to make a run at gold. Their title reign has been one of constant comedic bickering, given their political and cultural differences; Book/Bradshaw is probably the highest profile comedy act in Counterfactual history. They kept at the Rumble, going over the reunited SpreeKillers, Shane Helms and Chavo Guerrero and now step into the 3 way dance. One of their opposing teams is Super Crazy and Psychosis, managed by Carlito Colon, the Latino World Order. The LWO arrived in the summer of ’05, taking aim at Eddy. They browbeat him into putting his Undisputed Title up against Mysterio at Summer Slam – and when Rey won – they turned on him, with the support of Ric Flair. Juventud got the first shot at Rey, losing a 2 out of 3 falls Lucha Libre world title match at Survivor Series; Flair, now with the 51% Solution, stacked the deck at the Rumble, as both Psycho and Crazy, in a 3 way dance, got the title shot at the Rumble – Carlito was now the group’s mouthpiece, having punted Juvie, but again, the LWO failed to take the straps from Rey. However, their joining the Solution in the postmatch beatdown that took Rey out of action temporarily curried favor with the Solution and got them in this title match.
The third team will come from the winner of the opening match of WM XXII, which, by tradition for each of our shows, is a tag team match.
At XXII, it’s a 4 way, the former tag champs: Orton/Cena, MNM, DMW, and the new 51% Solution team of HHH and Executioner Lashley.
Orton and Cena were a comedy act, a team that got a babyface reaction because their heel shtick – Cena as wannabe rapper and Orton bragging about being Cowboy Bob’s kid, was so silly they couldn’t be taken seriously – they got a shocking win a year ago, at XXI over the then version of the SpreeKillers, Helms/Rhyno. The fans then began to turn on them, as they recognized that, particularly Cena, wasn’t worthy of holding the tag straps but yet acted as if he were, making heels Bradshaw and Dinsmore de facto faces at Summer Slam – and leading to a big babyface reaction for Bradshaw/Booker (which continued for Booker, less so for Bradshaw) when they beat Orton/Cena at Survivor Series. Since then, Orton/Cena have continued to lose, a rift developing between them as Orton clearly blames the lesser Cena for the defeats. Orton’s taken to showing off the RKO (which we’ve just called a diamond cutter – but will now give him his finisher name) demonstrating that he can take guys out whenever he wants. MNM and DMW have been feuding since Survivor Series, trading wins through the Rumble. MNM is the same act as in real world WWF, it’s Nitro and Mercury with Melina as the valet. They’re cocky heels. DMW is Dead Men Walking – Kane, still in the mask, and PAUL (The Big Show) with the Undertaker as the third man, sometimes working in the tag team, or in a trio, generally on the outside as an enforcer. Neither MNM nor any of the monsters have ever won a title, MNM has yet to get a shot – Undertaker had a shot at the WWF Title way back in Rumble ’94, when he was still unbeaten, he submitted to Bret Hart. He then had an IC shot at Vader 10 years ago at WM XII, losing that bout. The first version of DMW, Undertaker and Kane, had a tag title shot at SummerSlam ’03, but lost to the Clique, Michaels and HHH. They’ve been heels, faces, and feuded – but PAUL began to worship the Japanese wrestler Akira Taue, master of the chokeslam – even wearing Taue gear to the ring, the big men became lovable veterans, with Kane and eventually the ‘Taker following suit. The Dead Man has been a WM staple, holding the record as the 5 time winner of another WM tradition – the legend’s match – which at XXII is contested between Cactus and RVD. HHH and Lashley are a new team, representing the dominant stable in the WWF, the 51% Solution. Hunter, a former tag champ with Michaels, as mentioned, but long seen as the Clique water carrier, re-emerged at Summer Slam as the new husband of Stephanie McMahon, heir to the family business. Hunter said he had two percent creative control now over the WWF (Flair and Steamboat, both babyfaces, seemingly, had 49% apiece) making him the swing vote. He promised that come XXII, he’d be leaving Chicago with gold.
While HHH-M was beating Michaels at Survivor Series, ending the Clique forever – Lashley was debuting as the Executioner – he doesn’t speak, outside of a primal scream – he shakes the ropes – he punishes people – he has a black X, like Bernard Hopkins, over both his chest and back and wears a hood to the ring – although not when he wrestles. Flair joined Hunter (along with Arn) at Survivor Series, forming the 51% Solution and promised a 4th man would emerge at the Rumble. At that Rumble, HHH beat S Money (Benjamin) while Lashley, who had earlier mowed down the opposing teams in the tag title match – joined the Solution following the World Title match, taking Rey and Benoit both out. At the in ring announcement of the opening tag and subsequent tag title match – Lashley decimated the ring, taking apart all of the opposing teams, save the Undertaker, the only man he has yet to put down.
So, those are the title matches on the line at WM XXII – plus the 4 way opening tag.
It’s only a month away, The road concludes.
Road to Wrestlemania Part 2 2006
Saturday, February 10, 2007
In Part I of the Road to Wrestlemania XXII, we saw the set up for the following:
Dark Match: Punk v. London v. Kendrick v. Noble
Winners get Shot: HHH-M/Lashley v. DMW v. MNM v. Orton/Cena
Hardcore Legends Match: Cactus Jack v. RVD
Undisputed Tag Title: Bradshaw/Booker (w/Conway) v. LWO (w/Carlito) v. ?
There will be 6 more matches on the show, but one will be unannounced, so five matches left to set up here.
Coming out of the Rumble, the organizing feud is between the 51% Solution and the Sunshine Boys.
With Rey, Benoit, and Steamboat all off TV after the Rumble beating they took from the Solution, particularly Lashley, and the Solution doing a lot of bragging – it’s Dean Malenko who calls them out, specifically Arn.
Dean’s protecting Benoit here, of course, Dean/Benoit came into the company together, and were Horsemen back in their NWA days. Dean is now managing Fit, and we just did Dean/Benoit stuff during the Fit/Benoit IC program.
But they made up with handshakes all around after Fit took the strap at the Rumble, and now Dean is looking to call Anderson on the carpet, which makes sense as Arn and Dean were 2/3 of the Titan Trust for years (w/Fit) so obviously would have a strong relationship.
And that’s what Dean plays on now, he calls Arn out to the ring and cuts a promo on him – how it’s time to check the scoreboard. Fit’s the Worldwide Champ – trained by Dean – and where’s Arn?
Where he’s always been, walking behind Ric Flair.
And that’s gonna lead to this TV program, where it’ll largely be Fit/Regal against Flair/Hunter – with Dean and Arn on the outside as the focal points. Lashley is used only occasionally – always protected – if we see him, he’s squashing dudes.
The build is to a War Games match, which we’ve rarely had in the Counterfactual – that’s a 5 on 5 cage match, where each man enters one at a time, and it’s submission only.
The stakes: control.
If the babyfaces win – then Ricky Steamboat will have 100% managerial control of the WWF.
If the heels win – Steamboat gives his power to the Solution.
In the most famous War Games match in Counterfactual history – the Alliance (Benoit, Eddy, Dean, Perry) put up their careers against the belts held by all the WWF title holders (Angle, Austin, Dudleys). It was Malenko who tapped out – ending his career.
So, as this heats up – Arn challenges Dean to a War Games match – and Dean accepts.
They decide it will be 5 on 5.
So, Arn and Dean stand in the ring and announce their members:
For the Solution…
Arn, Flair, Hunter, Lashley are the obvious four – they come to the ring one by one – Lashley drawing the big pop as he is the unstoppable monster.
Arn says they needed a fifth guy – and since they are in control of the WWF – they handpicked a guy – a guy who needed a favor from the Solution – they picked…
Kurt Angle.
For those of you who missed the Rumble, Angle lost to Michaels, his first ever loss to Michaels, when Benjamin turned on him. Angle had been keeping Benjamin down, refusing to let him wrestle on PPV, for months.
Angle’s frothing at the mouth, the fully roided up maniacal Kurt Angle.
Angle comes to the ring, just screaming about Benjamin – yelling that he wants Benjamin at XXII – and it becomes apparent that’s the deal that was cut, Angle joins the Solution for the War Games, and they give him S Money at Mania.
So, there’s the next match.
That’s a long time coming, Benjamin debuted on Camp Angle, Angle’s “tough enough” reality show. Benjamin became 3 time tag champ, twice with Haas and once with Kurt. Haas and Benjamin turned heel with Brock – and remained heels to rejoin Kurt upon his turn. Those 3 added Regal to form Team Angle, which feuded for over 2 years with the Clique (Michaels, Edge, Christian, London).
At XXI, Angle ordered a code red on Haas, one in which Benjamin joined, even though he and Charlie were longtime partners. Charlie got fired. The Clique busted up, Edge fucking Lita – leading to Christian’s leaving the company – Regal went off on his own, joining Fit and Dean in Fit’s effort to return to active wrestling and win the IC. London became embroiled in the return of Kendrick and Noble – the Clique was forever disbanded when Hunter beat Michaels, and Benjamin became Angle’s valet, effectively, stewing as Kurt kept him from the big matches.
Benjamin turned at the Rumble – Michaels beat Angle (and then got speared again by Edge) and now Kurt will take on Benjamin at XXII.
Dean then introduces his team.
Dean, Fit, Regal, obviously…and then to the ring comes Steamboat.
Steamboat still has the other 49% of managerial power in the company, the announce screaming that the Dragon will be returning to the ring – but he won’t – instead, he announces the final two members of the team –
Rey and Benoit.
Neither one is there, but they’ll be returning for the first time since the Rumble – at the War Games match.
And that’s your Saturday Night’s Main Event – the big War Games matchup.
First two men to the ring, Hunter and Regal.
Next – Arn.
Next – Fit
Next – Dean, the babyfaces have the 3-2 advantage.
Angle’s music plays next – but no Angle.
Camera goes to the parking lot – where Angle and Benjamin are smashing each other into cars.
Then cuts to the back – where a panicked Flair looks into the locker room and says “You – get your ass out there. You’re replacing Angle”
We can’t hear the other half of the conversation, or see who it is Flair’s talking to.
We see Flair though, “Anything you want – Anything you want – just get out there now.”
Then cut back to the ring for the music of the replacement:
Edge.
Edge, still wearing the eyepatch, lost the Empty Arena match to Matt at the Rumble, when Matt stuck an icepick in his eye. This followed Matt crucifying Edge to the canvas with a nailgun after Edge’s Unsanctioned win over Matt at Summer Slam.
Since Edge’s affair with Lita and betrayal of Christian, he has no allies in the locker room, as his sleeping with Matt’s girl is thought “too far.” That led to the breakup of the Clique, the slow burning hatred between Edge and Michaels – and the feud with Matt, who still doesn’t have a contract.
Edge beats Matt at Summer Slam – gets crucified on RAW – appears at Survivor Series to spear Michaels, allowing for Hunter’s win and the death of the Clique – Matt and Edge’s fights on RAW pre-Rumble went into the stands, injuring a fan – so their Rumble match was Empty Arena – Matt evened it up with the pick to the eye – Edge ran in after Shawn beat Angle – spearing him.
And here he is, securing some promise from Flair, and now making it 3-3.
Flair’s next. And it’s 4-3 heels.
Next comes Benoit, the current holder of the Triple Crown (means he’s won all 3 WWF belts, only 9 guys have done it in the Counterfactual, there’s a trophy – it’s called the Hart-Guerrero Memorial Triple Crown). Benoit dropped the IC to Fit at the Rumble, but ran in to save Rey (Rey’s was Eddy’s “little brother” and Eddy was Benoit’s “little brother” so, by the transitive property – Benoit stepped into protect Rey pre-Rumble, and ran in for the save when the Solution attacked Rey at the Rumble’s close) then got wiped out by Lashley.
Next comes Rey. The Undisputed Champion of the World.
Rey took from Eddy in Eddy’s last match at Summer Slam, then kept over Juvie at Survivor Series, kept over both Crazy and Psycho at the Rumble – all with Flair trying to get the belt off him.
Rey makes it 5-4 faces. Meaning we’re just building for Lashley.
Lashley last – and he destroys all of the faces – tears at everyone – cleaning house with nothing but power moves and primal screams.
How can the faces stop Lashley?
Coming to the ring….Dead Men Walking.
Recall, from part one of the set up – Lashley wiped out all the other 3 teams set to meet in the opening Mania tag – including Kane and PAUL – and now, with the Undertaker – they come to the ring – Lashley – uncontrollable – leaves the cage to battle them.
The announce notes that Lashley’s making a terrible mistake – screwing the Solution – they had the Sunshine Boys wiped out – and now Lashley’s in the aisle batting the 3 giants.
Security swarms from every corner to control that – and with the numerical advantage, the babyfaces take control –
Benoit has Hunter in the crossface….Malenko has Arn in the cloverleaf…one of them will tap…one of them will tap – Steamboat, standing on the outside – is about to get control over the company –
When suddenly, almost from nowhere, Flair quickly gets Regal in the figure four –
And Regal submits.
Steve Regal submits to Ric Flair – the 51% Solution, even though undermanned – has won the War Games match and taken complete, 100% control of the WWF.
Everyone’s bleeding, of course, ‘cause of the cage.
Edge, Hunter, Flair, Arn celebrating – the babyfaces stunned – Regal is inconsolable – his head buried in his hands – Regal apparently crying – Regal has submitted – Fit, Regal’s training partner, longtime friend and rival goes to try to console him – try to give him some words…
Fit lowers Regal’s hands from his face…
And Regal is laughing.
Regal gets some quick shots in at Fit – then runs from the ring – the heels exiting the ring and laughing – Regal swerved them! Regal set the Sunshine Boys up! Regal has been working with the 51%...now the 100% Solution!
And that sets up the rest of the card.
The IC will be Fit defending against Regal. Regal was jealous, Regal sold out, Regal made a deal to get the title shot at Mania – you see the set up. Fit and Dean bring the full on hate for Regal – and they hook it up at XXII.
What did Edge demand for his participation?
We find out in an in ring promo – when Edge comes to collect from Flair.
Flair: Anything you want, big man. Anything you want. Wooooo!
Edge says he wants a Wrestlemania match.
Flair says of course – anyone you want – who do you want.
Edge says, “Matt Hardy.”
Flair says no. Flair has a desperate hatred for all things Matt Hardy – Matt’s doing the Pillman thing, Flair’s the bookerman – Flair’s sworn on his mother’s grave that Matt will never get a WWF contract.
Flair says no – he can’t do it, Edge can’t wrestle Matt Hardy at XXII.
Edge laughs – says there’s been a misunderstanding. Edge says he doesn’t want to wrestle Matt at XXII.
He wants to wrestle Matt at XXIII. One year from now, in Detroit. He wants to make crazy, off the chain, high strung Matt Hardy wait a full year.
Edge says what he wants from Flair is Matt’s contract. He wants to hold Matt Hardy’s WWF contract for a full year – he wants Matt Hardy to work for him – he wants to own Matt Hardy until WM XXIII, one year away – until then Matt Hardy can’t touch him – not even once – if Matt Hardy touches him, in or out of the ring – over the next year – then Matt is gone from the WWF forever.
I know, it’s a little forced. Just go with it. There’s more.
And, Edge says, at WM XXIII – when Edge takes on Matt Hardy one more time – one year from now – it won’t just be an ordinary match…
It’ll be a Hell in a Cell Match.
We’ve only had 2 in the Counterfactual – both very famous. Ken Shamrock threw Cactus Jack off the top of the cage through the table. Foley’s famous bump. And then, years later at XX, Jericho and Trish tossed Christian from the top – coincidentally, that was the night that Edge returned after a year and a half away with the neck surgery recovery following the last ever TLC match – the night the new Clique was formed.
So, there’s a full year to build to Edge/Matt. Hell in a Cell. WM XXIII.
Flair says it can’t be that easy for Matt Hardy.
Matt quit the company, he swore – he whined on the internet – he has attacked HHH-M. He comes out of the crowd and he has no respect. In all Flair’s years in this business, he’s never seen anyone as disrespectful as Matt Hardy.
He hates Matt Hardy. Hates him. Hates him.. Punk. Awful little punk.
Flair drops an elbow on the canvas.
Edge says okay, Ric. Okay.
Let’s make him work for it.
If Matt Hardy wants to wrestle me in a Cell at XXIII….then he’s got to win a match at XXII….
Against Ric Flair.
And Flair goes for that.
So, we’ve got Matt and Flair at XXII – if Matt wins, he’ll meet Edge next year in the Cell.
And that’s a long build.
If Matt loses – he’ll never step foot in the WWF again.
So, add that match.
Flair says to Edge – who do you want – who do you want to meet at WMXXII – anyone you want ---
When from the crowd comes Michaels – who superkicks Edge cold, “He’ll be wrestling me.”
So, there’s that.
And except for the title match – that’s your show.
What’s the title match?
Well, the Solution is concerned about the Rey/Benoit alliance. Say Flair and Hunter lose a tag to Rey and Benoit.
So, they need a way to break them up – to force some dissension.
They bring them to the ring in a promo – and come up with a genius plan.
At WM XXII- - Rey Mysterio will defend the Undisputed Championship – against the 2 time Champion, his buddy, Chris Benoit.
So, they start off, of course, as friends, recognizing they’re being played – but it’s wrestling, so while it’s still face/face – with the current Triple Crown holder and the previous Triple Crown holder wrestling for the big strap – they have enough tension to carry the program.
Arguably the two best wrestlers in the WWF – 2 of the best wrestlers who ever lived – Rey Mysterio and Chris Benoit – meeting each other for the first time in a PPV – at the main event at WM XXII.
So, here’s your card:
Undisputed Championship: Rey Mysterio v. Chris Benoit
Worldwide Titles: Fit Finlay (w/Dean) v. Steve Regal
Unified Tags: Bradshaw/Booker (w/Conway) v. LWO (w/Carlito) v. ?
HBK v. Edge
Kurt Angle v. S Money Shelton Benjamin
Ric Flair v. Matt Hardy
Hardcore Legends: Cactus Jack (w/Heyman) v. RVD (w/Stevie)
Winners get Shot: HHH/Lashley v. MNM v. DMW (w/Taker) v. Orton/Cena
Dark Match: Punk v. London v. Kendrick v. Noble.
It’s coming in March from Chicago! The Road Continues.
Dark Match: Punk v. London v. Kendrick v. Noble
Winners get Shot: HHH-M/Lashley v. DMW v. MNM v. Orton/Cena
Hardcore Legends Match: Cactus Jack v. RVD
Undisputed Tag Title: Bradshaw/Booker (w/Conway) v. LWO (w/Carlito) v. ?
There will be 6 more matches on the show, but one will be unannounced, so five matches left to set up here.
Coming out of the Rumble, the organizing feud is between the 51% Solution and the Sunshine Boys.
With Rey, Benoit, and Steamboat all off TV after the Rumble beating they took from the Solution, particularly Lashley, and the Solution doing a lot of bragging – it’s Dean Malenko who calls them out, specifically Arn.
Dean’s protecting Benoit here, of course, Dean/Benoit came into the company together, and were Horsemen back in their NWA days. Dean is now managing Fit, and we just did Dean/Benoit stuff during the Fit/Benoit IC program.
But they made up with handshakes all around after Fit took the strap at the Rumble, and now Dean is looking to call Anderson on the carpet, which makes sense as Arn and Dean were 2/3 of the Titan Trust for years (w/Fit) so obviously would have a strong relationship.
And that’s what Dean plays on now, he calls Arn out to the ring and cuts a promo on him – how it’s time to check the scoreboard. Fit’s the Worldwide Champ – trained by Dean – and where’s Arn?
Where he’s always been, walking behind Ric Flair.
And that’s gonna lead to this TV program, where it’ll largely be Fit/Regal against Flair/Hunter – with Dean and Arn on the outside as the focal points. Lashley is used only occasionally – always protected – if we see him, he’s squashing dudes.
The build is to a War Games match, which we’ve rarely had in the Counterfactual – that’s a 5 on 5 cage match, where each man enters one at a time, and it’s submission only.
The stakes: control.
If the babyfaces win – then Ricky Steamboat will have 100% managerial control of the WWF.
If the heels win – Steamboat gives his power to the Solution.
In the most famous War Games match in Counterfactual history – the Alliance (Benoit, Eddy, Dean, Perry) put up their careers against the belts held by all the WWF title holders (Angle, Austin, Dudleys). It was Malenko who tapped out – ending his career.
So, as this heats up – Arn challenges Dean to a War Games match – and Dean accepts.
They decide it will be 5 on 5.
So, Arn and Dean stand in the ring and announce their members:
For the Solution…
Arn, Flair, Hunter, Lashley are the obvious four – they come to the ring one by one – Lashley drawing the big pop as he is the unstoppable monster.
Arn says they needed a fifth guy – and since they are in control of the WWF – they handpicked a guy – a guy who needed a favor from the Solution – they picked…
Kurt Angle.
For those of you who missed the Rumble, Angle lost to Michaels, his first ever loss to Michaels, when Benjamin turned on him. Angle had been keeping Benjamin down, refusing to let him wrestle on PPV, for months.
Angle’s frothing at the mouth, the fully roided up maniacal Kurt Angle.
Angle comes to the ring, just screaming about Benjamin – yelling that he wants Benjamin at XXII – and it becomes apparent that’s the deal that was cut, Angle joins the Solution for the War Games, and they give him S Money at Mania.
So, there’s the next match.
That’s a long time coming, Benjamin debuted on Camp Angle, Angle’s “tough enough” reality show. Benjamin became 3 time tag champ, twice with Haas and once with Kurt. Haas and Benjamin turned heel with Brock – and remained heels to rejoin Kurt upon his turn. Those 3 added Regal to form Team Angle, which feuded for over 2 years with the Clique (Michaels, Edge, Christian, London).
At XXI, Angle ordered a code red on Haas, one in which Benjamin joined, even though he and Charlie were longtime partners. Charlie got fired. The Clique busted up, Edge fucking Lita – leading to Christian’s leaving the company – Regal went off on his own, joining Fit and Dean in Fit’s effort to return to active wrestling and win the IC. London became embroiled in the return of Kendrick and Noble – the Clique was forever disbanded when Hunter beat Michaels, and Benjamin became Angle’s valet, effectively, stewing as Kurt kept him from the big matches.
Benjamin turned at the Rumble – Michaels beat Angle (and then got speared again by Edge) and now Kurt will take on Benjamin at XXII.
Dean then introduces his team.
Dean, Fit, Regal, obviously…and then to the ring comes Steamboat.
Steamboat still has the other 49% of managerial power in the company, the announce screaming that the Dragon will be returning to the ring – but he won’t – instead, he announces the final two members of the team –
Rey and Benoit.
Neither one is there, but they’ll be returning for the first time since the Rumble – at the War Games match.
And that’s your Saturday Night’s Main Event – the big War Games matchup.
First two men to the ring, Hunter and Regal.
Next – Arn.
Next – Fit
Next – Dean, the babyfaces have the 3-2 advantage.
Angle’s music plays next – but no Angle.
Camera goes to the parking lot – where Angle and Benjamin are smashing each other into cars.
Then cuts to the back – where a panicked Flair looks into the locker room and says “You – get your ass out there. You’re replacing Angle”
We can’t hear the other half of the conversation, or see who it is Flair’s talking to.
We see Flair though, “Anything you want – Anything you want – just get out there now.”
Then cut back to the ring for the music of the replacement:
Edge.
Edge, still wearing the eyepatch, lost the Empty Arena match to Matt at the Rumble, when Matt stuck an icepick in his eye. This followed Matt crucifying Edge to the canvas with a nailgun after Edge’s Unsanctioned win over Matt at Summer Slam.
Since Edge’s affair with Lita and betrayal of Christian, he has no allies in the locker room, as his sleeping with Matt’s girl is thought “too far.” That led to the breakup of the Clique, the slow burning hatred between Edge and Michaels – and the feud with Matt, who still doesn’t have a contract.
Edge beats Matt at Summer Slam – gets crucified on RAW – appears at Survivor Series to spear Michaels, allowing for Hunter’s win and the death of the Clique – Matt and Edge’s fights on RAW pre-Rumble went into the stands, injuring a fan – so their Rumble match was Empty Arena – Matt evened it up with the pick to the eye – Edge ran in after Shawn beat Angle – spearing him.
And here he is, securing some promise from Flair, and now making it 3-3.
Flair’s next. And it’s 4-3 heels.
Next comes Benoit, the current holder of the Triple Crown (means he’s won all 3 WWF belts, only 9 guys have done it in the Counterfactual, there’s a trophy – it’s called the Hart-Guerrero Memorial Triple Crown). Benoit dropped the IC to Fit at the Rumble, but ran in to save Rey (Rey’s was Eddy’s “little brother” and Eddy was Benoit’s “little brother” so, by the transitive property – Benoit stepped into protect Rey pre-Rumble, and ran in for the save when the Solution attacked Rey at the Rumble’s close) then got wiped out by Lashley.
Next comes Rey. The Undisputed Champion of the World.
Rey took from Eddy in Eddy’s last match at Summer Slam, then kept over Juvie at Survivor Series, kept over both Crazy and Psycho at the Rumble – all with Flair trying to get the belt off him.
Rey makes it 5-4 faces. Meaning we’re just building for Lashley.
Lashley last – and he destroys all of the faces – tears at everyone – cleaning house with nothing but power moves and primal screams.
How can the faces stop Lashley?
Coming to the ring….Dead Men Walking.
Recall, from part one of the set up – Lashley wiped out all the other 3 teams set to meet in the opening Mania tag – including Kane and PAUL – and now, with the Undertaker – they come to the ring – Lashley – uncontrollable – leaves the cage to battle them.
The announce notes that Lashley’s making a terrible mistake – screwing the Solution – they had the Sunshine Boys wiped out – and now Lashley’s in the aisle batting the 3 giants.
Security swarms from every corner to control that – and with the numerical advantage, the babyfaces take control –
Benoit has Hunter in the crossface….Malenko has Arn in the cloverleaf…one of them will tap…one of them will tap – Steamboat, standing on the outside – is about to get control over the company –
When suddenly, almost from nowhere, Flair quickly gets Regal in the figure four –
And Regal submits.
Steve Regal submits to Ric Flair – the 51% Solution, even though undermanned – has won the War Games match and taken complete, 100% control of the WWF.
Everyone’s bleeding, of course, ‘cause of the cage.
Edge, Hunter, Flair, Arn celebrating – the babyfaces stunned – Regal is inconsolable – his head buried in his hands – Regal apparently crying – Regal has submitted – Fit, Regal’s training partner, longtime friend and rival goes to try to console him – try to give him some words…
Fit lowers Regal’s hands from his face…
And Regal is laughing.
Regal gets some quick shots in at Fit – then runs from the ring – the heels exiting the ring and laughing – Regal swerved them! Regal set the Sunshine Boys up! Regal has been working with the 51%...now the 100% Solution!
And that sets up the rest of the card.
The IC will be Fit defending against Regal. Regal was jealous, Regal sold out, Regal made a deal to get the title shot at Mania – you see the set up. Fit and Dean bring the full on hate for Regal – and they hook it up at XXII.
What did Edge demand for his participation?
We find out in an in ring promo – when Edge comes to collect from Flair.
Flair: Anything you want, big man. Anything you want. Wooooo!
Edge says he wants a Wrestlemania match.
Flair says of course – anyone you want – who do you want.
Edge says, “Matt Hardy.”
Flair says no. Flair has a desperate hatred for all things Matt Hardy – Matt’s doing the Pillman thing, Flair’s the bookerman – Flair’s sworn on his mother’s grave that Matt will never get a WWF contract.
Flair says no – he can’t do it, Edge can’t wrestle Matt Hardy at XXII.
Edge laughs – says there’s been a misunderstanding. Edge says he doesn’t want to wrestle Matt at XXII.
He wants to wrestle Matt at XXIII. One year from now, in Detroit. He wants to make crazy, off the chain, high strung Matt Hardy wait a full year.
Edge says what he wants from Flair is Matt’s contract. He wants to hold Matt Hardy’s WWF contract for a full year – he wants Matt Hardy to work for him – he wants to own Matt Hardy until WM XXIII, one year away – until then Matt Hardy can’t touch him – not even once – if Matt Hardy touches him, in or out of the ring – over the next year – then Matt is gone from the WWF forever.
I know, it’s a little forced. Just go with it. There’s more.
And, Edge says, at WM XXIII – when Edge takes on Matt Hardy one more time – one year from now – it won’t just be an ordinary match…
It’ll be a Hell in a Cell Match.
We’ve only had 2 in the Counterfactual – both very famous. Ken Shamrock threw Cactus Jack off the top of the cage through the table. Foley’s famous bump. And then, years later at XX, Jericho and Trish tossed Christian from the top – coincidentally, that was the night that Edge returned after a year and a half away with the neck surgery recovery following the last ever TLC match – the night the new Clique was formed.
So, there’s a full year to build to Edge/Matt. Hell in a Cell. WM XXIII.
Flair says it can’t be that easy for Matt Hardy.
Matt quit the company, he swore – he whined on the internet – he has attacked HHH-M. He comes out of the crowd and he has no respect. In all Flair’s years in this business, he’s never seen anyone as disrespectful as Matt Hardy.
He hates Matt Hardy. Hates him. Hates him.. Punk. Awful little punk.
Flair drops an elbow on the canvas.
Edge says okay, Ric. Okay.
Let’s make him work for it.
If Matt Hardy wants to wrestle me in a Cell at XXIII….then he’s got to win a match at XXII….
Against Ric Flair.
And Flair goes for that.
So, we’ve got Matt and Flair at XXII – if Matt wins, he’ll meet Edge next year in the Cell.
And that’s a long build.
If Matt loses – he’ll never step foot in the WWF again.
So, add that match.
Flair says to Edge – who do you want – who do you want to meet at WMXXII – anyone you want ---
When from the crowd comes Michaels – who superkicks Edge cold, “He’ll be wrestling me.”
So, there’s that.
And except for the title match – that’s your show.
What’s the title match?
Well, the Solution is concerned about the Rey/Benoit alliance. Say Flair and Hunter lose a tag to Rey and Benoit.
So, they need a way to break them up – to force some dissension.
They bring them to the ring in a promo – and come up with a genius plan.
At WM XXII- - Rey Mysterio will defend the Undisputed Championship – against the 2 time Champion, his buddy, Chris Benoit.
So, they start off, of course, as friends, recognizing they’re being played – but it’s wrestling, so while it’s still face/face – with the current Triple Crown holder and the previous Triple Crown holder wrestling for the big strap – they have enough tension to carry the program.
Arguably the two best wrestlers in the WWF – 2 of the best wrestlers who ever lived – Rey Mysterio and Chris Benoit – meeting each other for the first time in a PPV – at the main event at WM XXII.
So, here’s your card:
Undisputed Championship: Rey Mysterio v. Chris Benoit
Worldwide Titles: Fit Finlay (w/Dean) v. Steve Regal
Unified Tags: Bradshaw/Booker (w/Conway) v. LWO (w/Carlito) v. ?
HBK v. Edge
Kurt Angle v. S Money Shelton Benjamin
Ric Flair v. Matt Hardy
Hardcore Legends: Cactus Jack (w/Heyman) v. RVD (w/Stevie)
Winners get Shot: HHH/Lashley v. MNM v. DMW (w/Taker) v. Orton/Cena
Dark Match: Punk v. London v. Kendrick v. Noble.
It’s coming in March from Chicago! The Road Continues.
The Road to Wrestlemania, Part 1 2006
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
The Rumble is here.
Wrestlemania XXII is coming right at you from Chicago.
A total of ten matches on the card.
10?
Well, we have the traditional 8 to set up. Plus (here’s a tease) there will be an unannounced match during the show.
And – we have, of course, the dark match – and the build up for it, actually, is how we begin traveling the Road to Wrestlemania XXII.
Recall, at the Rumble, we saw the debut of CM Punk, seated in the crowd with Maria, also making her debut, Punk hopped over the barrier to hit the Pepsi Plunge on London in the 3 way that saw Kendrick get the fall over Noble.
This launches a program that’s going to run for the majority of 2006, centered around Punk as the guy who refuses to wrestle on WWF television.
Punk’s the manipulative heel, Joey puts him over as a puppet master; and when he reveals that he was the one telling Kendrick that London had screwed him out of his WWF spot – and telling Noble that Kendrick had screwed him out of his WWF spot – he maintains the animosity among the 3 men by convincing them that they are all simultaneously selling out and getting screwed over.
What do they all want? What, in their innermost hearts, before they fall asleep every night – what do London, Kendrick, and Noble all want?
They all offer the obvious answer – to be the Undisputed Champion of the World.
Punk says he couldn’t care less about that. He doesn’t wrestle for belts – he wrestles for himself.
He says that’s the problem with these guys, London, Kendrick, Noble – they have no code, they don’t have any honor – they’ll turn their back on the small company that made them for 30 pieces of silver and a shot at 3 gold belts.
And what does it get them?
Jamie Noble pinned Chris Benoit on PPV – and then he got fired.
Brian Kendrick got his arm busted up by the boss’s son in law – and then he got fired.
And worst of all is Paul London – one year ago, at Royal Rumble 2005, he beat, clean, in the middle of the ring, Rey Mysterio – the Undisputed Champion of the World – and where’s his world title shot?
He never got one.
See, Punk says, you all came here, to the WWF, to win titles – but the more you try for glory, for gold – the further away you get. Because, as Punk says, he’s never had one match in the WWF – and he’s won exactly as many WWF titles as all 3 of them put together – zero.
They challenge Punk – so what are you doing here then? Why are you in the WWF if you don’t care about being champion?
“Because I’m a professional wrestler. I came here to wrestle.”
The gimmick is that Punk refuses to wrestle on TV – not wanting it to be about ratings or camera angles or makeup – he doesn’t wrestle for the guy sitting on his couch, with his beer and his clicker and his hands down his pants – he wrestles for himself.
He’s so committed to it – as we get closer to XXII – that even though Wrestlemania is in his hometown of Chicago – and even though they have a match scheduled – a 4 way match to open up the show – Punk v. London v. Kendrick v. Noble – the only way he’ll do it – the only way CM Punk will go to Wrestlemania –
--is if it’s a dark match.
This allows for a discussion of the history of the dark match, it’s where we first saw Shawn take on Owen almost 20 years ago; it’s where, in the very first Wrestlemania, Dynamite beat Bret.
If it was good enough for Dynamite Kid and Bret Hart – Punk says – it’s good enough for me.
And that sets up the dark match – it’s Punk, the guy who refuses to wrestle on TV, against Noble, Kendrick, London – Noble/Kendrick doing an ex tag partner thing, playing up their ROH teaming – and Kendrick/London doing the same thing with their WWF teaming. Punk, all the while, continually stirring things up; also, continually refusing to wrestle – he gets booked in matches, but, wearing street clothes, always with a nearly naked Maria (so, so hot) in tow, refuses to work and takes forfeit losses.
The only other match that doesn’t have any relationship to the overarching 51% Solution angle is the ECW match.
Cactus Jack, recall, a Triple Crown Champion in the WWF, turned heel in his return at the Rumble. Foley appeared in the big tag champions matchup in the build to the Rumble, aiding RVD as he fought off Heyman’s ECW forces (if you don’t know why Heyman and RVD are feuding, check out the Rumble for the historical recap).
With Van Dam’s manager, Stevie Richards, out of commission, Foley seconded RVD in his Rumble match against Kid Kash – Van Dam went over – but then Foley turned on him, joining Heyman.
The thrust is that Foley has seethed seeing RVD called a hardcore icon – that Van Dam’s a pretty boy with the spinning and the flopping – and isn’t worthy of carrying on the ECW legacy (Van Dam beat Taz in the match that ended the ECW angle in the WWF, loser retired, winner got the carry the ECW flag forward) Van Dam’s a laid back stoner – not a hyperintense stoner like the ones who made ECW great.
Foley says he hasn’t been in a singles match at Wrestlemania in 6 years (more on Foley’s WM history in a minute) but when Paul Heyman, the finest man he ever met, called him to say, “Cactus, the boys need ya, come back for the boys” then he knew he had to return.
Cactus says he isn’t just here as the guy who was 2 time WWF Champion – not just here as one of only 9 men in the history of the WWF to hold the Triple Crown – he’s here as the greatest hardcore wrestler who ever lived – as the man who spilled blood on every continent and who lost his ear to Vader.
He won’t let Van Dam pollute his legacy.
We’ll also, since there isn’t one on the card, call this the Legend’s Match – and put over Foley’s WM history, for the benefit of the new fans.
Cactus’s first WM was XIII, in Chicago, as this Mania will be, he kept the IC over Vader in the blow off to their feud.
In XIV, he and Terry Funk lost their tag titles to the New Age Outlaws.
In XV, he regained the WWF Title, beating Owen Hart in a pure science matchup, Owen’s last ever match.
And in Foley’s last match as a fulltime wrestler, he lost that title the following year, at XVI, to Benoit, the man who currently holds that Triple Crown.
Foley then returned for the legend’s match at XX, teaming with The Rock to go over Goldberg and Lesnar.
Foley says if, at WM 22 – in Chicago – there’s going to be a match to determine who the greatest Hardcore Legend is – then it won’t be RVD with his hand raised – it’s gonna be Cactus Jack.
Stevie, as RVD’s mouthpiece, says he knows Cactus Jack’s pedigree – he’s seen him on the Today Show – he’s seen his books on the NY Times bestseller list – he’s seen Beyond the Mat – everyone knows that Cactus Jack is the greatest wrestler in ECW history…
…but answer me this, Cactus….how many ECW title belts did you win?
Stevie shows a clip – from November 2 Remember ’95, with Cactus getting pinned by 2 Cold Scorpio, failing in his bid to win the TV Title.
I guess that would be zero, Cactus. Zero.
But what about R….V…..D….Stevie rolls the clip package…
Van Dam, the following year at N2R ‘96, taking the TV strap from 2 Cold – then Van Dam, at Barely Legal, ECW’s first PPV, keeping that belt over the Great Sasuke – then at Hardcore Heaven, keeping over Al Snow –then at N2R ‘97, one year after winning the TV belt – keeping over Jerry Lynn –then keeping over 2 Cold at Living Dangerously ’98 – then, 2 years, a full 2 years after winning the ECW TV belt – keeping again, over Lynn at N2R…then over Sabu at Living Dangerously ’99…then over Taka Michinoku at Hardcore Heaven…then over Taz at Heatwave..finally losing the ECW TV title to Lance Storm at N2R ’99…
…3 years after winning the title.
Van Dam points to his head in the way that he does.
Stevie says he doesn’t need to show the clips of RVD winning his two ECW World Titles – being the last ECW Champ until the belt was taken over by WWF – doesn’t need to show clips of RVD being the 2 time IC champ – being the WWF tag champ –
--because when a man has held a title belt for 3 consecutive years, the longest modern day title reign – that man deserves to be called the Hardcore Legend – and at WM XXII, in Chicago – in the greatest hardcore match of all time – he’s gonna prove it – against Cactus Jack.
So, there’s that.
Dark Match: Punk v. London v. Kendrick v. Noble
Hardcore Legend’s Match: Cactus Jack (w/Heyman) v. RVD (w/Stevie)
8 matches left on the show, 7 to set up for the card. Everything else comes out of the 51% Solution angle.
Okay – to review. Flair, upon transitioning from full time active wrestler to co-figurehead GM, made his first WWF face turn at XXI, he and Steamboat doing the co-general manager gimmick.
Hunter, a full year out of the limelight, returned at Summer Slam ’05, now with the name McMahon added to his, having married the Princess. Hunter said he’d been overlooked too long, held down by the politics in the company, disrespected. And he promised that, next year, at XXII, he’d leave with gold.
They came together at Survivor Series; Hunter, with Edge’s aid, beat Shawn, forever ending the Clique – in a wild scene that revealed Hunter and Flair had been aligned in a grab for power – Flair’s 49% of management, coupled with Hunter’s 2% McMahon Family Proxy, giving them the upperhand, hence the term, 51% Solution.
With Arn, former member of the Titan Trust (w/Dean and Fit) as the 3rd member – they promised at 4th to be revealed at the Rumble – and that turned out to be the dominant newcomer, Executioner Lashley.
After decimating Rey, Benoit, and Steamboat at the Rumble’s close, the 51% Solution sets off on the Road to WM XXII as the pivotal force in the company.
The first thing they do is set up the two tag matches.
The LWO: Carlito, Crazy, Psychosys – which is morphing, because I like the angle so much, into an LAX group – hard, tough, less funny, less soft than the current Carlito/Crazy gimmicks. We’ll put them in whatever the relevant gang colors are – get Carlito to snarl a little bit – a scar would be a nice touch – by summer, they’ll have fully morphed into WWF version of LAX.
The LWO comes calling on the 51% Solution, asking for a shot at the tag belts held by Bradshaw (heel, the NeoCon) and Booker (face, just wants to get paid). Flair has a violent dislike of Rey as Champion, and has used the LWO in both Survivor Series and the Rumble to try to take the belt.
Both times they failed – but at the Rumble’s conclusion, the LWO stood with the 51% Solution to beat down the babyfaces, and now want a tag title shot in return.
Arn isn’t happy about it – giving Carlito the business for failing to beat Rey – and there’s a moment in the ring where it looks like it’s gonna go down between the two heel groups.
But Flair calms Arn down – and Hunter says they have a deal – that at XXII, Bradshaw and Booker will defend their titles against Crazy and Psycho.
And then MNM hit the ring.
Melina says at the Rumble – her men beat Dead Men Walking – and they deserve the title shot at XXII.
This pisses LWO off – Carlito making some type of sexual come on to Melina – which pisses N and M off – and it looks like those two heel groups are gonna go – when Dead Men Walking: Kane, PAUL, and the Undertaker, come to the ring…
PAUL says they may have lost at the Rumble – but they beat MNM at Survivor Series – and the Undertaker is the ultimate Wrestlemania legend, with 5 legends wins – and if anyone’s wrestling Booker and Bradshaw for the tag titles – it’s them.
Much staring – much jawing – the 51% Solution considers…
Then Orton and Cena hit the ring.
They say one year ago, at XXI, they became WWF tag team champions – they lost their belts to Booker and Bradshaw at Survivor Series – and as the only two guys here who have ever actually won WWF gold (a dig at the big men, none of whom have ever had any WWF title belts) they should get the shots at XXII.
Much jawing.
Flair settles things down.
Well, at WM XXII – there’s gonna be a tag title match.
Booker and Bradshaw will defend the Undisputed Tag Titles against…..Psycho and Crazy, the LWO…
…but it will be a 3 team match – because they’ll also be facing the winner of the opening tag team match – a match between Kane/PAUL – MNM – and Orton/Cena!
Hunter takes the mic…oh yeah, one other thing…he says…
There won’t be 3 teams in that opening tag.
There are going to be four.
Arn and Flair start to smirk.
The fourth team…”me…..and The Executioner!”
Lashley then hits the ring and cleans house – just destroying guys – all 3 members of the LWO – both Nitro and Mercury – both Orton and Cena – Lashley clotheslines Kane and PAUL clean out of the ring – and goes nose to nose with the Undertaker, until he is pulled away by the Solution.
Lashley’s a monster – an unstoppable beast – hopefully, the crowd pops – you get the idea of the booking.
So, to the dark match and the Hardcore Legend’s Match, we add the two tags:
Opening Tag: HHH-M/Lashley v. DMW v. MNM v. Orton/Cena
Undisputed Tag Title: Bradshaw/Booker (w/Conway) v. LWO (w/Carlito) v. ?
4 down, 5 matches left to set up.
And we’ll set those matches up, when the Road to Wrestlemania XXII returns…
Wrestlemania XXII is coming right at you from Chicago.
A total of ten matches on the card.
10?
Well, we have the traditional 8 to set up. Plus (here’s a tease) there will be an unannounced match during the show.
And – we have, of course, the dark match – and the build up for it, actually, is how we begin traveling the Road to Wrestlemania XXII.
Recall, at the Rumble, we saw the debut of CM Punk, seated in the crowd with Maria, also making her debut, Punk hopped over the barrier to hit the Pepsi Plunge on London in the 3 way that saw Kendrick get the fall over Noble.
This launches a program that’s going to run for the majority of 2006, centered around Punk as the guy who refuses to wrestle on WWF television.
Punk’s the manipulative heel, Joey puts him over as a puppet master; and when he reveals that he was the one telling Kendrick that London had screwed him out of his WWF spot – and telling Noble that Kendrick had screwed him out of his WWF spot – he maintains the animosity among the 3 men by convincing them that they are all simultaneously selling out and getting screwed over.
What do they all want? What, in their innermost hearts, before they fall asleep every night – what do London, Kendrick, and Noble all want?
They all offer the obvious answer – to be the Undisputed Champion of the World.
Punk says he couldn’t care less about that. He doesn’t wrestle for belts – he wrestles for himself.
He says that’s the problem with these guys, London, Kendrick, Noble – they have no code, they don’t have any honor – they’ll turn their back on the small company that made them for 30 pieces of silver and a shot at 3 gold belts.
And what does it get them?
Jamie Noble pinned Chris Benoit on PPV – and then he got fired.
Brian Kendrick got his arm busted up by the boss’s son in law – and then he got fired.
And worst of all is Paul London – one year ago, at Royal Rumble 2005, he beat, clean, in the middle of the ring, Rey Mysterio – the Undisputed Champion of the World – and where’s his world title shot?
He never got one.
See, Punk says, you all came here, to the WWF, to win titles – but the more you try for glory, for gold – the further away you get. Because, as Punk says, he’s never had one match in the WWF – and he’s won exactly as many WWF titles as all 3 of them put together – zero.
They challenge Punk – so what are you doing here then? Why are you in the WWF if you don’t care about being champion?
“Because I’m a professional wrestler. I came here to wrestle.”
The gimmick is that Punk refuses to wrestle on TV – not wanting it to be about ratings or camera angles or makeup – he doesn’t wrestle for the guy sitting on his couch, with his beer and his clicker and his hands down his pants – he wrestles for himself.
He’s so committed to it – as we get closer to XXII – that even though Wrestlemania is in his hometown of Chicago – and even though they have a match scheduled – a 4 way match to open up the show – Punk v. London v. Kendrick v. Noble – the only way he’ll do it – the only way CM Punk will go to Wrestlemania –
--is if it’s a dark match.
This allows for a discussion of the history of the dark match, it’s where we first saw Shawn take on Owen almost 20 years ago; it’s where, in the very first Wrestlemania, Dynamite beat Bret.
If it was good enough for Dynamite Kid and Bret Hart – Punk says – it’s good enough for me.
And that sets up the dark match – it’s Punk, the guy who refuses to wrestle on TV, against Noble, Kendrick, London – Noble/Kendrick doing an ex tag partner thing, playing up their ROH teaming – and Kendrick/London doing the same thing with their WWF teaming. Punk, all the while, continually stirring things up; also, continually refusing to wrestle – he gets booked in matches, but, wearing street clothes, always with a nearly naked Maria (so, so hot) in tow, refuses to work and takes forfeit losses.
The only other match that doesn’t have any relationship to the overarching 51% Solution angle is the ECW match.
Cactus Jack, recall, a Triple Crown Champion in the WWF, turned heel in his return at the Rumble. Foley appeared in the big tag champions matchup in the build to the Rumble, aiding RVD as he fought off Heyman’s ECW forces (if you don’t know why Heyman and RVD are feuding, check out the Rumble for the historical recap).
With Van Dam’s manager, Stevie Richards, out of commission, Foley seconded RVD in his Rumble match against Kid Kash – Van Dam went over – but then Foley turned on him, joining Heyman.
The thrust is that Foley has seethed seeing RVD called a hardcore icon – that Van Dam’s a pretty boy with the spinning and the flopping – and isn’t worthy of carrying on the ECW legacy (Van Dam beat Taz in the match that ended the ECW angle in the WWF, loser retired, winner got the carry the ECW flag forward) Van Dam’s a laid back stoner – not a hyperintense stoner like the ones who made ECW great.
Foley says he hasn’t been in a singles match at Wrestlemania in 6 years (more on Foley’s WM history in a minute) but when Paul Heyman, the finest man he ever met, called him to say, “Cactus, the boys need ya, come back for the boys” then he knew he had to return.
Cactus says he isn’t just here as the guy who was 2 time WWF Champion – not just here as one of only 9 men in the history of the WWF to hold the Triple Crown – he’s here as the greatest hardcore wrestler who ever lived – as the man who spilled blood on every continent and who lost his ear to Vader.
He won’t let Van Dam pollute his legacy.
We’ll also, since there isn’t one on the card, call this the Legend’s Match – and put over Foley’s WM history, for the benefit of the new fans.
Cactus’s first WM was XIII, in Chicago, as this Mania will be, he kept the IC over Vader in the blow off to their feud.
In XIV, he and Terry Funk lost their tag titles to the New Age Outlaws.
In XV, he regained the WWF Title, beating Owen Hart in a pure science matchup, Owen’s last ever match.
And in Foley’s last match as a fulltime wrestler, he lost that title the following year, at XVI, to Benoit, the man who currently holds that Triple Crown.
Foley then returned for the legend’s match at XX, teaming with The Rock to go over Goldberg and Lesnar.
Foley says if, at WM 22 – in Chicago – there’s going to be a match to determine who the greatest Hardcore Legend is – then it won’t be RVD with his hand raised – it’s gonna be Cactus Jack.
Stevie, as RVD’s mouthpiece, says he knows Cactus Jack’s pedigree – he’s seen him on the Today Show – he’s seen his books on the NY Times bestseller list – he’s seen Beyond the Mat – everyone knows that Cactus Jack is the greatest wrestler in ECW history…
…but answer me this, Cactus….how many ECW title belts did you win?
Stevie shows a clip – from November 2 Remember ’95, with Cactus getting pinned by 2 Cold Scorpio, failing in his bid to win the TV Title.
I guess that would be zero, Cactus. Zero.
But what about R….V…..D….Stevie rolls the clip package…
Van Dam, the following year at N2R ‘96, taking the TV strap from 2 Cold – then Van Dam, at Barely Legal, ECW’s first PPV, keeping that belt over the Great Sasuke – then at Hardcore Heaven, keeping over Al Snow –then at N2R ‘97, one year after winning the TV belt – keeping over Jerry Lynn –then keeping over 2 Cold at Living Dangerously ’98 – then, 2 years, a full 2 years after winning the ECW TV belt – keeping again, over Lynn at N2R…then over Sabu at Living Dangerously ’99…then over Taka Michinoku at Hardcore Heaven…then over Taz at Heatwave..finally losing the ECW TV title to Lance Storm at N2R ’99…
…3 years after winning the title.
Van Dam points to his head in the way that he does.
Stevie says he doesn’t need to show the clips of RVD winning his two ECW World Titles – being the last ECW Champ until the belt was taken over by WWF – doesn’t need to show clips of RVD being the 2 time IC champ – being the WWF tag champ –
--because when a man has held a title belt for 3 consecutive years, the longest modern day title reign – that man deserves to be called the Hardcore Legend – and at WM XXII, in Chicago – in the greatest hardcore match of all time – he’s gonna prove it – against Cactus Jack.
So, there’s that.
Dark Match: Punk v. London v. Kendrick v. Noble
Hardcore Legend’s Match: Cactus Jack (w/Heyman) v. RVD (w/Stevie)
8 matches left on the show, 7 to set up for the card. Everything else comes out of the 51% Solution angle.
Okay – to review. Flair, upon transitioning from full time active wrestler to co-figurehead GM, made his first WWF face turn at XXI, he and Steamboat doing the co-general manager gimmick.
Hunter, a full year out of the limelight, returned at Summer Slam ’05, now with the name McMahon added to his, having married the Princess. Hunter said he’d been overlooked too long, held down by the politics in the company, disrespected. And he promised that, next year, at XXII, he’d leave with gold.
They came together at Survivor Series; Hunter, with Edge’s aid, beat Shawn, forever ending the Clique – in a wild scene that revealed Hunter and Flair had been aligned in a grab for power – Flair’s 49% of management, coupled with Hunter’s 2% McMahon Family Proxy, giving them the upperhand, hence the term, 51% Solution.
With Arn, former member of the Titan Trust (w/Dean and Fit) as the 3rd member – they promised at 4th to be revealed at the Rumble – and that turned out to be the dominant newcomer, Executioner Lashley.
After decimating Rey, Benoit, and Steamboat at the Rumble’s close, the 51% Solution sets off on the Road to WM XXII as the pivotal force in the company.
The first thing they do is set up the two tag matches.
The LWO: Carlito, Crazy, Psychosys – which is morphing, because I like the angle so much, into an LAX group – hard, tough, less funny, less soft than the current Carlito/Crazy gimmicks. We’ll put them in whatever the relevant gang colors are – get Carlito to snarl a little bit – a scar would be a nice touch – by summer, they’ll have fully morphed into WWF version of LAX.
The LWO comes calling on the 51% Solution, asking for a shot at the tag belts held by Bradshaw (heel, the NeoCon) and Booker (face, just wants to get paid). Flair has a violent dislike of Rey as Champion, and has used the LWO in both Survivor Series and the Rumble to try to take the belt.
Both times they failed – but at the Rumble’s conclusion, the LWO stood with the 51% Solution to beat down the babyfaces, and now want a tag title shot in return.
Arn isn’t happy about it – giving Carlito the business for failing to beat Rey – and there’s a moment in the ring where it looks like it’s gonna go down between the two heel groups.
But Flair calms Arn down – and Hunter says they have a deal – that at XXII, Bradshaw and Booker will defend their titles against Crazy and Psycho.
And then MNM hit the ring.
Melina says at the Rumble – her men beat Dead Men Walking – and they deserve the title shot at XXII.
This pisses LWO off – Carlito making some type of sexual come on to Melina – which pisses N and M off – and it looks like those two heel groups are gonna go – when Dead Men Walking: Kane, PAUL, and the Undertaker, come to the ring…
PAUL says they may have lost at the Rumble – but they beat MNM at Survivor Series – and the Undertaker is the ultimate Wrestlemania legend, with 5 legends wins – and if anyone’s wrestling Booker and Bradshaw for the tag titles – it’s them.
Much staring – much jawing – the 51% Solution considers…
Then Orton and Cena hit the ring.
They say one year ago, at XXI, they became WWF tag team champions – they lost their belts to Booker and Bradshaw at Survivor Series – and as the only two guys here who have ever actually won WWF gold (a dig at the big men, none of whom have ever had any WWF title belts) they should get the shots at XXII.
Much jawing.
Flair settles things down.
Well, at WM XXII – there’s gonna be a tag title match.
Booker and Bradshaw will defend the Undisputed Tag Titles against…..Psycho and Crazy, the LWO…
…but it will be a 3 team match – because they’ll also be facing the winner of the opening tag team match – a match between Kane/PAUL – MNM – and Orton/Cena!
Hunter takes the mic…oh yeah, one other thing…he says…
There won’t be 3 teams in that opening tag.
There are going to be four.
Arn and Flair start to smirk.
The fourth team…”me…..and The Executioner!”
Lashley then hits the ring and cleans house – just destroying guys – all 3 members of the LWO – both Nitro and Mercury – both Orton and Cena – Lashley clotheslines Kane and PAUL clean out of the ring – and goes nose to nose with the Undertaker, until he is pulled away by the Solution.
Lashley’s a monster – an unstoppable beast – hopefully, the crowd pops – you get the idea of the booking.
So, to the dark match and the Hardcore Legend’s Match, we add the two tags:
Opening Tag: HHH-M/Lashley v. DMW v. MNM v. Orton/Cena
Undisputed Tag Title: Bradshaw/Booker (w/Conway) v. LWO (w/Carlito) v. ?
4 down, 5 matches left to set up.
And we’ll set those matches up, when the Road to Wrestlemania XXII returns…
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)