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Triple H, October 2011:

“When I grew up, I hated Hogan. I thought he was terrible and didn’t like to watch him. I was like Punk in a way. I liked the Steamboats and Flairs and the ones that could go. Would I be right in saying that Hogan was the wrong guy to go with, and they should’ve changed directions and gone with Steamboat because he was the better wrestler? Ludicrous.” - Triple H. October, 2011.

Royal Rumble 1994

Sunday, January 22, 2006



Survivor Series is here.

Royal Rumble – 1994 Providence
(Dark – Sean Waltman d. Bob Holly)

JR gets fired at the top of February, so this is the last JR/Cornette. Thanks, Vince.

1. Smoking Gunns d. Headshrinkers
Billy! Bart! The Smoking Gunns!

2. Jeff Jarrett d. Lex Luger
Jarrett’s PPV debut is a surprise upset win over Lex, Jarrett’s cheating, and general Jarrett-ness starts to spin Lex in a face direction. Lex is clearly frustrated after the match, the announce speculates that perhaps he will need to make some type of change. Jarrett does the fargo strut. Fun!

3. Diesel d. Bam Bam Bigelow
Nash powers through the Beast from the East, remaining unbeaten. Bigelow is clearly frustrated after the match, the announce speculates that he will need to make some change.

4. Tenryu d. Mr. Backlund
A solid wrestling match, Backlund could do enough to make it worth our while to watch this one. Our Japanese xenophobia ends as Tenryu makes the face turn on the bizarre Mr. Backlund, “Young Homoguchi…Young Kanemoto…stop your flagellating and get back to learning how to crash some planes! Tojo Forever! We will love you long time! Semper Fi!”

5. No DQ: Owen Hart d. Randy Savage
 Full on brawl. Owen doesn’t hold back from the bell, it’s fists from the jump. Owen drags Savage to the outside, lays into him with chairshots – Owen hurls Savage hard into the retaining barrier – Owen pulls up the mat outside the ring – but Savage takes control and piledrives Owen on the exposed floor. That kinda thing. Randy constantly encourages Owen to hit him harder, to make him bleed, Randy still teaching at every moment. Crazy ass Randy.

At one point, Savage pulls out the fork – but Owen takes it away..and after a moment to think about it – Owen plows the fork into Savage’s head. Fork! Fork! Fork! Both guys covered in blood. Savage submits to the sharpshooter. Afterward, Owen offers Savage his hand, Randy responds by attempting a clothesline – which Owen expected, so Owen slips, and levels Savage with the enziguiri. Owen leaves in triumph, shaking his head incredulously at Savage, who, covered in blood, continues to yell encouragement to Owen, “Dig it, yeah, ridin’ the Rocketship to the title! To infinity and beyond, yeah~”

Crazy ass Randy.

6. Tags: Rougeaus (w/ Scott Levy and Ted) d. Steiners
14 months later, the run ends. Ted shows that everybody’s got a price, when Scott turns on Rick, allowing Jacques to get the fall. The "brothers" hug. Everybody hugs. Everyone gets a briefcase full of cash, and Jacques has his second tag title, with two different partners. The Steiners leave soon after, they do Scott v. Rick on RAW until their deal expires.

7. IC: Shawn Michaels (w/Diesel) d. Razor Ramon (w/Waltman)
Shawn and Razor are a good mix; HBK rolls on in his great IC run, he and Diesel cheat constantly, doubleteams, low blows, pulling the tights, feet on the ropes. Razor continually fights back – the crowd solidly with him – finish comes when Razor hits the Edge and has the fall – but Diesel distracts the official – Waltman runs in…here comes the Kid – and climbs to the top and hits the legdrop on Razor. Goddamn Kid. Heel turn. Michaels rolls atop Razor for the win.

Diesel goes underneath the ring and emerges with a ladder. They set it up in the middle of the ring – the crowd startled – they’ve never seen a ladder in a wrestling ring before – Michaels climbs to the top – and to the astonishment of the people (recall, it was Shawn at Summer Slam a year and a half before who debuted the table bump) comes down on Razor with the elbowdrop. The place goes ballistic – they saw the crazy Owen/Savage – they saw Scott turn on Rick – they just saw Waltman join the Clique – and now Michaels has jumped off a freaking ladder in the middle of the ring. The Clique celebrates – Waltman now is the guy he is, a complete punk, kissing up to the cool guys and mocking Razor. All three guys pull out toothpicks and shower them atop Ramon. Pose. Handsigns.

8. WWF Title: Bret Hart d. Undertaker
This is a good fucking show. Undertaker is favored, I’d say, 60/40 by the crowd, frustrating Bret – who also is frustrated by his inability to hurt the dead guy, who, as of yet, in 3 years, has known no fear and shown no pain. Bret does the rough stuff and gets booed – gets booed when he goes closed fist – gets booed when he does the suicide dive to the outside. But note, this is a great match, the Undertaker’s first good match ever – as this marks the transition from the early Undertaker zombie matches – to the middle Undertaker brawling matches. So the dead guy’s willing to mix it up with Bret outside – no more methodical Undertaker, he’s all over Bret, which whips the crowd into even more of a frenzy as they know this is the spot when Hennig lost and they can smell the title change. They do a table bump, Undertaker chokeslamming Bret through the Spanish announce, giving the crowd another reason to lose their minds.

Bret. Clean. Sharpshooter submission. That’s right. Not only does Bret end the unbeaten streak, which is thing enough – but Bret makes the impervious dead man submit clean right in the middle of the ring – and that’s the most shocking result of the entire evening.

Bret stands in ring and holds the belt up defiantly – that’s what it is – ‘cause in his mind, any cheer for anyone but him is a slight to his ability – part of the crowd is crazyrabid – ‘cause Counterfactual WWF's core audience loves Bret and would have hated the idea of switching to the Undertaker – but the masses were all about the dead guy – and so we have some folks booing, some folks in shock, some folks rabid, hopefully everyone respecting that we just took a guy unhurt for 3 straight years and had him tap out to the world champion. Defiance by the Hit Man as he holds the belt for 2 straight years. Defiance.

Think people are ready for Wrestlemania X?

They will be.

At the NWA PPV, Harlem Heat get a win, as does DDP. Dustin beats Orndorff. Vader beats Rude. Regal over Mero, the new tag champs – unfortunately – are the Nasty Boys, who go over Sting and Foley when Mick turns all Cactus Jack all over Sting. In the big angle, the Horsemen split in half – see, AA wanted a title shot (the show’s in Georgia) but Flair wouldn’t give him one – Pillman sided with Arn, the two of them turning face. But the heels go over – Austin keeping the US over Pillman – and Flair keeping the big belt over AA. Good fucking show.

Superbrawl – 1994 Albany, GA
NWA Title: Ric Flair d. Arn Anderson
US Title: Steve Austin d. Brian Pillman
Tags: Nasty Boys d. Sting/Jack
Steve Regal d. Marc Mero

Vader d. Rick Rude
Dustin Rhodes d. Paul Orndorff
DDP d. Maxx Payne
Harlem Heat d. Steele/Garvin

On the road to X….

X is a problem in that the bottom of the actual card was bad – and they had some guys work twice, meaning that I am stretched incredibly thin. But, necessity is the mother of something…

A few weeks before X, they bring out….Lelani Kai.

Seriously. On RAW. She reminds us that X years ago, at I, US women’s wrestling in the WWF died when she, Wendi Richter, and Cindi Lauper got buried by Bundy and Studd.

But it’s been X years – and women’s wrestling is back! So, every Raw, like 2 or 3 in a row, the women put on like a 5 minute match. The week before X, it’s interrupted by a fat black guy in the aisle. He says he’s on a mission. It’s Mabel. Hi, Mabel! He says he hates women’s wrestling, and at X he’s gonna show how much he hates women’s wrestling – when he and his buddy…

..enter Yokozuna….

Destroy Lelani Kai and Alundra Blayze…just like Bundy and Studd did X years ago.

What else, the Heavenly Bodies break up. Why? Why? Why? And we’re gonna do Del Ray/Pritchard at X. Adam Bomb is terrorizing the WWF. Luger and Bigelow join together, recall each had to assess his career after the Rumble – well, they are now a face tag team – and they’ll meet the Still Fabulous Rougeaus at X.

And now the things that matter.

The Clique opens the RAW after Survivor Series. Or maybe a couple of weeks later, without Razor appearing yet, to give him a chance to sell the ladder bump. HBK, Diesel, Waltman. They bring out a ladder which Michaels sits atop once they get into the ring. They make fun of Razor, talk about how they replaced him with Waltman, he’s a better wrestler, he’s better with the fat girls, and he can’t quite drink as much as Razor can – but they’ll learn him. Michaels says he’s king of the WWF – he’s on top of the mountain – he’s been IC champ for over a year – he’s the greatest IC champ of all time – he put Owen through a table – and he jumped 20 feet off a ladder (gimmicked number, but, you know, wrestling math) and buried his elbow into Ramon – says we may never see Razor Ramon again. Waltman sticks out his tongue – it’s too soon for crotch chops – but you can tell he’s thinking about it.

From the crowd – Razor – ribs heavily taped up suddenly enters and knocks over the ladder – Michaels takes the enormous spill all the way to the outside – which is the biggest bump in company history at this point – it all happened so fast the crowd is completely shocked – Diesel and Waltman sell the shock – as if Razor’s gone too far – they bail out of the ring – Michaels is bleeding heavily – Diesel and Waltman carry him from ringside…

Razor: Hey, yo. Hey Se-xy Boy. You like to play with ladders? No-body swings the wood…like the Bad Guy, Chico. At Wrestlmania X – you and me – In-ter-cont-in-ental Title….Ladder Match!

No one knows what he means, of course, but they explain it between now and Mania.

So, they keep selling Razor v. the Clique – neither Diesel or Waltman has a match at X, so they stay in the angle - they do an injury thing with Waltman, to move him aside a bit, have Razor beat him in a singles then toss him into a ladder with an Edge. They take half an hour out of every WWF show and do Clique talk – lots of smirking, laughing at the other side – lot of ladder stuff. I think it's probably time to start selling a special section of the arena for Clique fans. We sell the Clique as like brothers – broken up – and headed for the ultimate showdown at the crazy gimmick match at X.

At the top – Bret will promo at the end of that first RAW after the Rumble. Huge mixed reaction – Bret does his thing – says he’s beaten every man in the company – says he’s appeared at every WM – says he’s headlined 3 WM – says he’s going to X, the biggest show of all time, as the WWF Champion for a record 2 straight years – says there’s no man in the world who can beat him – he challenges anyone in the back, anyone in the back who has the heart….

...Anyone who has the heart to stand in front of him in the biggest match of all time to try to take his belt….

Pomp and Circumstance.

Bandaged up Savage enters – stops in the aisle.

Bret says okay – it’s a rematch from Wrestlemania V – and while Randy, lets be honest, says Bret, isn’t the wrestler he was a couple of years ago – Bret will accept the challenge and defend his title against the former WWF champion.

Randy says nope. His day is past – he’ll wrestle in the legends match at X (which will be against Crush, hopefully with Smash and Ax in his corner) yeah, since he is the true legend of the WWF – but there is someone in the back who Bret’s never beat….

…there is someone in the back who Randy thinks is ready to be champion…

…there is someone in the back who has the “heart”, ooh, yeah, to go toe to toe with Bret in the biggest match at the biggest show in the history of this sport…..

Owen Hart.

Hit Owen’s music – Owen to the ring – Owen and Bret go nose to nose.

Bret shakes his head – calls him little brother, tells him he knows how talented Owen is – he knows Owen is a great young wrestler, he knows Owen will one day will be WWF champion – but that day won’t be at WM X.

Owen says the best day of his life wasn’t 6 years ago when he debuted in the WWF, wasn’t a year and a half ago when he beat Shawn Michaels for the IC title, wasn’t last night when he earned the respect of the legend of the WWF Randy Savage – the best night of his life was 10 years ago, in 1985, when he sat in the crowd at Madison Square Garden and watched his brother, his hero, Bret Hart, wrestle a dark match before WM I against the Dynamite Kid. It was really the first match in the history of WM – and there was his brother Bret.

That was the best day of his life.

Until WM X. Because at WM X – at WM X in Madison Square Garden, in the biggest match on the biggest night in the history of wrestling – at WM X, for one perfect night, Owen Hart will be the best there was, the best there is, the best there ever will be….

This doesn’t sit well with Bret.

They jaw, the crowd screams, finally Bret accepts.

They build by having them wrestle the same guys or the same types of guys, say, in one week, Bret beats Jarrett – the next week, Owen beats him. In one week Bret beats a garbage wrestler, then a tag team, then a junior, then a monster. Owen does the same. They have taped interviews with everyone in the company picking the winner – they do all the Calgary stuff – I want tapes, home movies, I want interviews with every Hart – half an hour of every WWF show between the Rumble and X is geared toward this match with the constant question being – who is really the better man?

--- so at X, we’ll have HBK/Razor climbing the ladder and Owen/Bret for the strap. Brother against Brother. Wrestlemania X is a house divided.

It’s Wrestlemania X after all; it's a Counterfactual, but I’m not stupid.

Survivor Series 1993

Saturday, January 21, 2006


Summer Slam is here.


Survivor Series – 1993 Boston

JR and Cornette on the announce.

(Dark – Mr. Backlund d. Mike Rotundo)

Promo by the Undertaker.

Yeah, it’s his first promo. “Three years ago, the most dominant force in professional wrestling history began his destructive rampage across the WWF. Many have asked, ‘Undertaker, what do you want…Undertaker…why are you here’…

Tonight…all will be revealed.”

Lights off. He disappears.

1. Heavenly Bodies d. Headshrinkers
-The Gigolo! The Doctor of Style! After the match. Lights. Bong. Bong. Lights on…Undertaker in the ring. Chokeslams all around. Big pop.

2. Diesel (w/Razor) d. Keith Hart/Bruce Hart
-Destruction. Utter destruction. Owen attempts to save – but Savage attacks him in the aisle – yelling “stay focused!” as he pounds Owen in the aisle. The fans chant for Bret…he doesn’t appear. Keith and Bruce are stretchered out. Nash yells “that’s one”…Razor, “no, Chico – two.” Nash..”yeah, but between ‘em they only add up to one. Hey, Bret – thanks for the meat!”

3. Bam Bam Bigelow d. Jacques Rougeau
-Bigelow gets another face win. Lights. Bong. Bong. Lights on. Undertaker in the ring. Chokeslams all around. Big pop. What is this message the Undertaker is trying to send?

4. Razor Ramon (w/Diesel) d. Marty Jannetty
-More destruction. Another stretcher job. The Clique just be burying motherfuckers. Razor, “now, that’s two.” Nash, “one more to go – we got a stretcher all picked out for you Lightning.” Much smirking.

5. Owen Hart d. Randy Savage (DQ)
Savage with the closed fists, the low blows, pulling the tights – everything from the playbook – eventually Owen goes closed fists too, Owen takes the fight outside – hey, Owen’s learning…maybe Randy’s not crazy…

Then Randy pulls out the fork. Fork. Fork. Fork. Randy carves up Owen’s forehead – the crowd turns on him, the announce turns on him – Randy has that Randy look, he ignores the officials and Fork, Fork, Fork into Owen’s head. DQ. Blood spurting everywhere – Randy eventually backs away, crazed look in his eye – “You gotta learn, Rocket…You gotta learn! I love you, Owen! Yeah! I love you so hard, Dig it! You gotta learn! Oooooh, Yeah!”

Bret…nowhere to be seen.

6. Tags: Steiners d. Rock n Roll Express (w/Ted)
Ricky and Robert were shot by now, but they would take the suplexes long enough for it to be a good match. Same gimmick, Ted has the briefcase – Cornette salivates over it at the announce, talking finder's fee– Ted’s ready to pay off – but the Steiners keep again and have held the straps for a full year. Lights. Bong. Bong. Lights on. Chokeslams to the Express and DiBiase - The Steiners start woofing, the unbeaten tag team champions….Chokeslam! Chokeslam! The Undertaker has left ‘em laying here at Survivor Series ’93 – the three year anniversary of his entrance – what is it that is driving the Dead Man? Why is the Dead Man doing this? What does the Undertaker want??????

7. IC: Shawn Michaels (w/Razor and Diesel) d. The Lightning Kid Sean Waltman
Michaels keeps A terrific match, Waltman bringing the high flying, Michaels matching him the best he can. Diesel gets involved once or twice on the outside with a couple of shots in at Waltman – how can the kid compete…how can any of us compete against the mighty Clique?

Superkick, elbowdrop. Pinfall. Michaels’s dominance continues.

After the match – beatdown time – Diesel jackknife. Razor holds Waltman up for the Edge….

Then he puts him down.

Michaels and Diesel do the “do it, do it – what’s going on with you - do it..” Razor holds him up again….again, puts the beaten Waltman down. That’s it for the Clique – Diesel grabs Waltman, looking to powerbomb him out of the ring – Razor stops him – Razor fights off Diesel – Razor fights off Michaels – the Clique gains command with the double team – but then Waltman fights back with Razor – the two of them knock Diesel/Michaels over the top rope to the outside.

We have a face turn. Me, Me, Me, Me, Me.

8. WWF Title: Bret Hart d. Lex Luger
Not really in doubt, obviously. Sharpshooter. Submission. Bret’s tied Hennig’s mark, and raises the belt high in the air.

Lights. You gotsta be feeling this one. Bong. Bong.

Lights on. Undertaker in the ring.

Recall, the Undertaker aided Bret – Bret shook his hand – that’s how the Dead Guy turned face in the Yoko program.

Now, they stand face to face, Bret, obviously, doesn’t back down…

And the Undertaker makes the motion that he wants the belt.

Three unbeaten years later – and the Undertaker wants the belt…

The crowd’s been kept hot all night with all the angles, and it’s been an angle heavy night – and now they freak out as the lights go back off. Back on. Undertaker gone.

Bret holds the belt high in the air as the show ends.

The year ends with Starrcade. Terry Taylor returns to the NWA and gets a win over the Boss Man, who also returned. Rude, now a face, gets a win. Vader beats Orndorff. Regal beats Dustin again. Sting and Foley keep. Austin, recall, now a member of the Horsemen, takes the US from 2 Cold. And Flair keeps over Steamboat.

Starrcade – 1993 Charlotte
NWA Title: Ric Flair d. Ricky Steamboat
US Title: Steve Austin d. 2 Cold Scorpio
Tags: Sting/Jack d. Nasty Boys
Steve Regal d. Dustin Rhodes

Vader d. Paul Orndorff
Rick Rude d. Mark Bagwell
Terry Taylor d. Bubba Rogers
Paul Roma/Maxx Payne d. Godwinns


On the road to the Rumble, we meet Jeff Jarrett, who gets a couple of wins as a southern heel. No guitar. No singing. They do Jarrett/Luger at the PPV

Mr. Backlund does his Mr. Backlund thing, turning his crazy “I hate America today” rants into a “I hate Japan today too.” It’s a “Back in the Great War, under Tojo, under Emperor Hir-o-hi-to, the Japanese man was a courageous man! The Japanese man understood sacrifice and marksmanship and the proper place of a woman in society! I used to wish that Japan had won the war! I used to think that if Japan had won the war, then we wouldn’t be such a sissified, Oprah loving people today! But now I see that the Japanese man is no better than the White man. Today, in Japan, the average man spends 11 hours a day playing video games and watching cartoons, and looking at pornographic magazines, and flagellating his Japanese organ in a very degrading way! Would Tojo flagellate himself while watching cartoons! Is that what the great Japanese comical-kaze pilots died for?”

Backlund will go over Yoko, hitting him with the Japanese flag – serving to turn Yoko face. We’ll do Backlund and a returning, face turning Tenryu at the Rumble. We love the Japanese man!

Savage tells the people he carved Owen up for his own good. Randy gets a mostly heel reaction, but not entirely. Savage promos on Owen, showing clips of Owen’s debut when he was called the next great wrestler, the best Hart of all – then shows Owen getting taken out by Hennig – shows Owen losing at V to Martel. Savage shows the clips of Owen/Shawn, when they were seen as equals – then shows Shawn now becoming the top heel in the company – now holding the IC title for a year – and shows Owen getting wiped out by Razor, by Yoko, by Savage.

Savage’s point clear – Owen’s just too soft. And if Savage has to take a fork to him again and again and again to prove it – he’s gonna prove it.

Owen attacks – Owen and Savage brawl – they’ll meet at the Rumble in a No DQ match.

Ted, still eager to take out the Steiners, is hounded by a young man named Scott Levy, who some feel would look good in a flannel shirt, Scott says he’s the man with the plan – that he’s put together a tag team and a plan to win the titles at the Rumble. The team is Still Fabulous Rougeau Brothers – the former tag team champion, Jacques Rougeau with Pierre Rougeau, no one really thinks Pierre is a Rougeau, but Scotty says of course they are, if they weren't brothers, why would they do this, and then they hug and hug. Good stuff – they go over the Smoking Gunns and get their title shot.

And the two big angles. We open RAW after SSeries with promos from Shawn/Diesel and Razor/Waltman. Shawn/Diesel do a “you broke up the family, Razor, the three of us were brothers – all the hours we’d sit in the back, watching Ric Flair or Bret Hart – talking about when our time would come – when we’d be headlining wrestlemanias – when we’d be wearing world title gold around our waist – when we’d be picking up fat chicks at the hotel bar, two and three at a time –

“well, we’ve already done that”

“but you gave all that up, Razor, you gave all that up because of some punk kid – because of Sean Waltman – you gave all that up because you had a soft spot for some cruiserweight..”

“or maybe that’s a hard spot – huh, Razor? The fat chicks weren’t enough, you had to go out and get yourself a bitch?”

That kinda thing.

Waltman and Razor would enter – Razor doing a “Hey, yo. You think it about the Kid? It ain’t a-bout the Kid, Chico. It…about….me. Maybe you missed the memo, Se-xy Boy – but I am Ra-zor Ra-mon. I ain’t your flunky, H-B-K – and I sure…as hell….ain’t yours, Big Mang. I did not come to the W..W..F to be friends, I did not come to the W…W…F…to hang out at the bar af-ter the show (that’s more of a joke for the boys, even when they’re on opposite sides, you know, the jokes) I came..to the W…W…F, for on-ly one rea-son….be-cause the Bad Guy, Ra-zor Ra-mon…he – like – gold, Chico.

And Se-xy Boy…at the Roy-al Rum-ble…the Bad Guy is gonna take…your gold.”

Like that.

Then Bret comes out to the top of the aisle and smirks at all of them – in the way that the Clique did to he and Hennig. Bret takes credit for the breakup – Bret shows clips of how happy the Clique used to be – lots of man on man hugging shots – some sad music as they show the breakup from Survivor Series. Bret laughs – saying it’s tough to see boyfriends fight, particularly when none of them will ever get what they all really want – the WWF Championship that for a year and a half has been around the waist of the best there is, the best there was, the best there ever will be – so they can bicker, they can squabble, they can kill each other or kiss each other, he doesn’t really care – all he knows is at the Royal Rumble, he’s going to defend the WWF Title and break Mr. Perfect’s record – and he’s going to WM X as WWF Champion for two full years. Lights. Bong. Bong.

That kinda thing.

They do a Razor/Diesel single at some point, non finish. They build to a tag before the Rumble – give Razor a pin over Michaels – but the Clique does the beatdown. Razor/Michaels for the IC at the Rumble. Diesel’s gonna work a single against Bigelow.

And the main…lot of Undertaker stuff – over 3 years unbeaten, lots of highlight packages of all the guys he’s destroyed – it’s a lot of guys – he’s never been pinned, never been hurt – he’s unbeatable…all that stuff. Undertaker will do another promo, he’s the reaper of wayward souls, he’s the avenger of those who have gone before, where was Andre the Giant’s title shot? Where was Hulk Hogan’s rematch? For every big man who has toiled in the darkness of the WWF for the past ten years, it’s time for vengeance – the belt belongs to all of them – and the Undertaker, the phenom, is going to make sure they inherit the gold at the Royal Rumble (see what I did there? It’s the big man as marginalized minority. It’s a counterfactual!) – the Undertaker will be the man to go to Madison Square Garden, at Wrestlemania X, as the WWF Heavyweight Champion of the World. It’s total face/face stuff with he and Bret – no turn, but probably, at this point – the fans lean Undertaker strong over Bret, for all the reasons earlier discussed – and that would piss Bret off to no end. We’ll do one physical confrontation on the RAW before the Rumble – Undertaker will go over, say Luger, Bret will come out – they’ll do the nose to nose – Bret will be the one who attacks – Bret punching – and the dead guy lays him out – chokeslam…tombstone…Bret left laying in the ring – Undertaker stands over, making the motion for the belt – what’s gonna happen at the Royal Rumble? What’s gonna happen at Wrestlemania X??

I’m feelin’ me all of these angles. With the Clique thing, the Bret/UT thing, and Owen/Savage – I’m saving the company during its worst period financially. They love me – I’m gonna get to marry the Princess. Hot little Stephanie, I wouldn’t make her get all that plastic surgery, hell no, just back that thang up and let me do my drrrty bidness.

Or not.

It's Royal Rumble '94. Bret/Undertaker for the strap. Michaels/Razor for the IC. Steiners/Rougeaus for the tags. Another Owen/Savage. Tenryu/Backlund. Diesel/Bigelow. Luger/Jarrett. Good god you gotsta call your cable company!

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